Thursday, August 30, 2018
All Too Easy
It’s
all too easy for me to –
Admit
defeat.
Blame
others, the world, God, circumstances, the universe, everything and everyone
else but myself.
Feel
sorry for myself.
Just
give up.
Stop
trying.
Surrender.
Think
the world is against me and nothing I do is ever good enough.
Think
I’m a failure. Failure to Launch for one.
And
yes, sometimes, I feel weighed down and overwhelmed by my responsibilities. I also
admit that I have a problem with relationships, specifically staying in one. I’m
not sure if it’s because of the ghosts of the beaux past and the pain endured
after each relationship ended or if it’s just me who’s afraid of being hurt and
reluctant to commit.
I
do have my ups and downs, my bad days when I feel I’ve lost my mojo and it
takes a few days at most for me to get my groove back and snap out of it. And while
it’s only too easy to just give up, I won’t. Because God will always test us
all anyway and it’s not how you fall or fail but how you pick yourself up and
mend that matters. This is life after all. It’s never going to be a breeze, a
rose garden, smooth without any bumps. Life will always throw you a curveball
when you least expect it and are least prepared for it.
Just
understand and give me space when I’m down and in the doldrums. Because it’s
never easy to bounce back but bounce back I will, insyaAllah.
On
another totally different note: Happy Independence Day, Malaysia.
SCRIBBLED BY
ADEK FÀB
at
8/30/2018 06:10:00 pm
|
Labels: LIFE, RANTS, REFLECTIONS
Monday, August 20, 2018
Our Saturday Night Fever
I had never attended my alma mater alumni dinner before despite being a member for a while now and wouldn’t have considered it had my friend not persuaded and beseeched me to go. I asked my closer mates, N and C, if they wanted to go and surprise, surprise, they agreed to go. So I had no choice but to give our names. The cost was pretty steep to me and even alumni members received a slight discount. I quickly browsed and booked an apartment unit for the three of us but later cancelled it as I wasn’t happy when the apartment management wanted a deposit even before we checked in. Sod it. I then booked another apartment unit at another building about ten minutes’ walk away from the hotel via Airbnb.
On Saturday, 11 August 2018, I left micasa after 09:30. I was running late so I took the MRT to Pasar Seni then changed for the GoKL bus to The Weld. From The Weld, I walked to Parkview apartment and after meeting the apartment unit representative, I left my bag and shoes and walked to KLCC for my date with Tommy.
I had to run errands and only returned to Parkview after my late lunch. After retrieving the keys, I went up to the unit and made myself comfortable. While waiting for my mates to arrive, I decided to pump the iron.
My mates arrived well after 5 p.m. and I went down to fetch them and bring them back to the apartment. We then had a quick practice for our batch’s Flash Mob performance at the dinner (yes, you read that right! Me with my two left feet!) before taking our shower and getting ready for the evening. We left well after 8 p.m. and my friends insisted they were not going to walk to the hotel so who was I to argue (unless I wanted to walk all by myself there).
We had fun catching up with each other and taking lots of photos. We had to listen to speeches but that was expected and well, we don't have the opportunity to listen to these old girls/seniors talk that often anyway. Dinner was served after the speeches. The food was great but inadequate: a platter of fruit plate for a table of 10? Either the hotel thought we were on a diet or wanted to pull a lame joke. The amount I paid didn’t justify the menu (Malay and local food, not even International or Western). There was no door gift either and I wasn’t lucky enough to win any lucky draw prize.
We left well after midnight - alhamdulillah exiting from the carpark wasn’t a nightmare as at the hotel where The Organisation holds its dinner. In fact, there was hardly any queue to exit the carpark at all.
Alumni dinners are great for meeting up with old friends. You get to meet with long lost friends in one place and don't have to talk or socialise all that much. There were those who were warm and genuinely happy to meet others and made the effort: my mates flew back from Doha, England, Kota Bharu and Kuala Terengganu; one rode the bus from Johor Bahru, one came over from Singers and my mate, N, drove up from Jasin. But there were also those who were aloof, unfriendly and cold and my mates and I couldn’t help wondering why they even bothered going if they couldn't be bothered to make the effort. Perhaps it’s their natural character that we’re not aware of. Or perhaps it was just us and perhaps there were others who felt the same towards us. As for me, I’m not on the batch’s Telegram group, heck, I don’t even have the Telegram app (nor do I bother with installing it; I already have enough WhatsApp messages to inundate me; I’m not even in the batch’s WhatSapp group because by the time I even bothered installing the App, the group had reached its membership limit); I don’t join in their annual trips, well, mainly because I’ve been to the places they went to, I didn’t get the notification because I'm not in the Telegram group and I’ve grown to love my own solo trips. In short, I keep mainly to myself but I’m sure I’m not the only one to do so.
So would I go to the next alumni dinner in two years’ time? It’s too soon to tell but some of our friends’ lukewarm indifferent attitude certainly didn’t have us exactly promising to be there. Then again, time will tell.
On Saturday, 11 August 2018, I left micasa after 09:30. I was running late so I took the MRT to Pasar Seni then changed for the GoKL bus to The Weld. From The Weld, I walked to Parkview apartment and after meeting the apartment unit representative, I left my bag and shoes and walked to KLCC for my date with Tommy.
I had to run errands and only returned to Parkview after my late lunch. After retrieving the keys, I went up to the unit and made myself comfortable. While waiting for my mates to arrive, I decided to pump the iron.
My mates arrived well after 5 p.m. and I went down to fetch them and bring them back to the apartment. We then had a quick practice for our batch’s Flash Mob performance at the dinner (yes, you read that right! Me with my two left feet!) before taking our shower and getting ready for the evening. We left well after 8 p.m. and my friends insisted they were not going to walk to the hotel so who was I to argue (unless I wanted to walk all by myself there).
We had fun catching up with each other and taking lots of photos. We had to listen to speeches but that was expected and well, we don't have the opportunity to listen to these old girls/seniors talk that often anyway. Dinner was served after the speeches. The food was great but inadequate: a platter of fruit plate for a table of 10? Either the hotel thought we were on a diet or wanted to pull a lame joke. The amount I paid didn’t justify the menu (Malay and local food, not even International or Western). There was no door gift either and I wasn’t lucky enough to win any lucky draw prize.
We left well after midnight - alhamdulillah exiting from the carpark wasn’t a nightmare as at the hotel where The Organisation holds its dinner. In fact, there was hardly any queue to exit the carpark at all.
Alumni dinners are great for meeting up with old friends. You get to meet with long lost friends in one place and don't have to talk or socialise all that much. There were those who were warm and genuinely happy to meet others and made the effort: my mates flew back from Doha, England, Kota Bharu and Kuala Terengganu; one rode the bus from Johor Bahru, one came over from Singers and my mate, N, drove up from Jasin. But there were also those who were aloof, unfriendly and cold and my mates and I couldn’t help wondering why they even bothered going if they couldn't be bothered to make the effort. Perhaps it’s their natural character that we’re not aware of. Or perhaps it was just us and perhaps there were others who felt the same towards us. As for me, I’m not on the batch’s Telegram group, heck, I don’t even have the Telegram app (nor do I bother with installing it; I already have enough WhatsApp messages to inundate me; I’m not even in the batch’s WhatSapp group because by the time I even bothered installing the App, the group had reached its membership limit); I don’t join in their annual trips, well, mainly because I’ve been to the places they went to, I didn’t get the notification because I'm not in the Telegram group and I’ve grown to love my own solo trips. In short, I keep mainly to myself but I’m sure I’m not the only one to do so.
So would I go to the next alumni dinner in two years’ time? It’s too soon to tell but some of our friends’ lukewarm indifferent attitude certainly didn’t have us exactly promising to be there. Then again, time will tell.
SCRIBBLED BY
ADEK FÀB
at
8/20/2018 01:26:00 pm
|
Labels: ALMA MATER, ALUMNI DINNER, RANTS, REFLECTIONS
Monday, July 30, 2018
11+ Hours In SG
I
had been a bit indifferent to Arsenal during the recent season but decided to
meet them when they announced they would be playing in International Champions
Cup in Singapore in July. After a few attempts at securing the ticket for the
Saturday match against Paris Saint Germain, I finally managed to get my ticket.
Next was securing the bus ticket and I was gutted to find that Nice Coach had
stopped its bus services to Singapore from 1 July 2018. As I didn’t want to get
the bus from TBS, I bought First Coach ticket online departing from Lengkok
Abdullah near Bangsar LRTstation for RM60. Then I spent some time browsing for
bus tickets to return the same evening after the match (no way was I going to
overnight there) and after reading reviews of a few bus operators, I decided to
buy Transtar ticket departing from Golden Mile Complex at Beach Road departing
at 22:45 and arriving opposite Berjaya Times Square. The ticket cost SGD20 and
I added another SGD1 for insurance.
I
woke up early on Saturday, 28 July, and prepared some sandwich for breakfast
and my trip. We left for Bangsar LRT station and waited for the First Coach
office to open at 07:00 to get my ticket. There were 3 other Gooners in their
respective Arsenal tops (I planned to change just before the match) in the same
bus. I received my ticket together with a bottle of water and a packet of
Jacob’s crackers.
We
left on time and were soon breezing down PLUS Highway heading south. Traffic
was blessedly smooth all the way. We stopped at Pagoh R&R at 09:40 to
utilise the facilities and were off again at 10:05. Traffic was again kind
until we crossed over the second link into Singapore – I didn’t even want to
wonder how bad the traffic was at Causeway. Our bus only cleared the queue
after 20 minutes. There was another long wait at the Singaporean passport
control. I stood for almost 45 minutes before I was cleared.
It
was about 13:30 when we reached Novena Square and I wasted some time before
boarding the MRT for Orchard. I made my way to Royal Plaza on Scotts to perform
prayers. The prayer room had relocated since my last visit to the second floor
(or first floor; Singaporeans are so American-influenced despite being a
British settlement!) and you need to climb up the staircase up (the right-hand
staircase when you enter the hotel). I left at 15:15 and wandered off to Isetan
before heading to Lucky Plaza where I discovered a shop selling confectionery
and snacks at very competitive prices. I then crossed over to Ngee Ann City and
after a brief visit to Wisma Atria, I returned to Ngee Ann City and had an
early dinner at the Food Village. After dinner, I caught up with social media
before boarding the MRT for Nicoll Highway station as I wanted to check out the
Golden Mile Complex and ascertain where the Transtar office was.
I
was waiting to cross Java Road when a bus turned into the road and it took a
few seconds for me to realise it was the Arsenal bus with the players in it
heading for the National Stadium!!! I realised too late to fish out my device
and take a picture of it. I could see Cech and Matteo sitting by the window
closest to me and they were literally five metres away from me! FIVE!!!
After
that brief excitement, I continued on to Golden Mile Complex. I don’t know why
it was named such but the building houses several bus operators along with some
Vietnamese- and Thai-owned businesses and Transtar was at the other end of the
building. There was a Thai Buddhist shrine across from Transtar office. I asked
if I could collect my ticket then and was told to come at 22:15. I continued on
and walked to the stadium.
Before
entering the stadium, I went to Kallang Wave Mall and went to find the prayer
area there (found out when I was searching for prayer rooms near the stadium).
It was near the washrooms around the corner from Fair Price. I went to the
washroom and changed my top before returning to Fair Price to get some mineral
water. There was an announcement urging those of us planning to watch the match
to make our way there immediately.
There
was a short queue heading into the stadium and security check. Those with bags
had to queue in different queues and after having our bags checked, we
underwent body check. My seat was in section 7 so I had to walk a bit before
going up to where my row was. There were a few idiots in ManUre and Cheshit
tops too.
The
match started around 19:45 and when Paris Saint Germain equalised from the
spot, I started getting worried. A draw would mean penalty shootout which would
mean the match would end later than expected and I might not be able to perform
prayers after the match but at some R&R stop later that night. As it turned
out, I needn’t have worried as the Gunners scored another four goals and the
final score was 5-1. I left immediately and went back to Kallang Wave Mall.
After freshening up and performing ablutions, I performed prayers in the prayer
area. My, it was stuffy in there. No air-conditioning at all. It was 22:02 when
I left and I hurried back to Beach Road. I arrived at Transtar office at 22:16
and checked in. I wasn’t issued any ticket but the girl noted my printed ticket
and gave me a bottle of water. I went into the building to find a washroom but
left immediately. It wasn’t a nice place at all. I walked to the nearby Caltex
and used the bathroom there instead. There just wasn’t time to go to Zam Zam to
buy any murtabak to go.
My
bus arrived as I was walking to Caltex and it was parked at the other end of
the building from Transtar. It was a double decker bus and I purposely chose a
seat at the lower deck as I wanted to go out and in quickly. We left on time
and I dozed off during the trip to Tuas Checkpoint. As Transtar was a
Singaporean company, I had worried earlier if there were more Singaporeans on
board which mean they would clear the Singaporean passport control quickly and
the bus may leave without me but I needn’t have worried as the Tuas Checkpoint
was almost deserted then (it was almost midnight) and the passport control
process took five minutes tops. We then re-boarded the bus and crossed over to
Malaysian soil. Again, it was a quick process at the Johore side and before
long, we were travelling north. The bus stopped somewhere for a washroom break
but I was too sleepy to get down then.
We
arrived at the bus stop at Plaza Berjaya (under the Imbi monorail and opposite
Times Square) at 04:15 and I sat there waiting. There were many cars on the
road even at that hour and the bus stop was brightly lit so I wasn’t afraid. I had
planned to walk down to Pudu and wait until Subuh to perform prayers before
taking the bus back but CT came to pick me up.
And
that was my trip to SG this time. I wasn’t in the mood to shop at all despite
the Great Singapore Sale so I hardly spent apart from on MRT tickets, some
chocolates and dinner. And besides, Singapore is not cheap especially when you
earn MYR. I could find a similar thing at a lower cost at Isetan KLCC compared
to Singapore. But it was a good day trip nevertheless.
SCRIBBLED BY
ADEK FÀB
at
7/30/2018 01:45:00 pm
|
Monday, July 16, 2018
A Short Birthday Getaway
I
try not to fly AirAsia if I can help it and was surprised to find myself
looking at the destinations the cattle airline back in December. I didn’t stop
there but proceeded to buy tickets to Nha Trang in Vietnam and Surat Thani in
Thailand well in advance. The Surat Thani trip had since been cancelled as AA
decided to retire that route wtf.
Friday,
6 July 2018
It
started raining early in the morning but stopped just before I left micasa for
the bus station for the bus to KL Sentral. I slipped in a mini brolly into my
suitcase just in case. I had to wait a bit as the usual service didn’t operate.
The feeder bus only left after 08:00 and fortunately for me, the traffic was
clear despite the earlier rain and when we reached KL Sentral at 08:14, I
jumped out and made my way across the KL Sentral concourse to the platform for
the buses to KLIA 2. I bought the ticket quickly – some moronic wench thought
it was OK to cut my queue while I was being served – and loaded my bag into the
bus. The bus departed at 08:20. Talk about cutting it close!
We
arrived at KLIA 2 at 09:10 and I rushed up to the departure area. I was pumped
with adrenaline and reached my gate within 15 minutes and that was after a
quick bathroom pitstop. We were supposed to board at 09:50 but we were only
called to do so after 10:05. We took off slightly after schedule and I settled
in for the flight. The captain was a bit annoying with his announcements and
poems woven into his announcements. I think I was one of the two covered girls
in the flight which was great.
We
landed at Cam Ranh International Airport at 10:30 local time and had to take a
bus to the terminal. I was the first one out of the bus and I rushed up to
passport control. Evidently there was another flight that landed ahead of ours for
there were already some Caucasians queuing. The process was quick though,
unlike the one in Busan, and I was done within 7 minutes. I exited the building
and looked around for signs for the bus and located it to the left of the exit.
I had read that you could take bus number 18 to Nha Trang city and sure enough,
there was a small kiosk selling bus tickets for that bus. The ticket cost
VND50,000. The girl at the kiosk told me to wait 20 minutes so I decided to use
the bathroom. The bathroom was clean but there were annoying flies flying
around and it made me realise their presence. For some reason, there were quite
a few flies. Not that many to be annoying but enough to make you notice.
20
minutes stretched into half an hour and finally the bus was there. The day was
promising to be hot but at least there was a nice continuous breeze at where we
sat waiting for the bus. We boarded the bus and after it made a long detour to
pick passengers from the domestic terminal, we were finally on our way to the
city. The female bus conductor asked where I wanted to get down and I told her
Hung Vuong. The highway from the airport gradually led us to the coastal road
to the city. Nha Trang is about 30 km away from the airport and I got down 45
minutes later at Trần
Phú and thanks to google maps, managed to
find my hotel without any problem. I checked in (the lady asked for my
passport) and went up one floor to my room. The room was perfect for a
two-night stay. After performing prayers and resting, I ventured out into the
afternoon sun and heat.
I walked up Hung Vuong and immediately
noticed the many, many shops selling exotic leather handbags (by that I mean
crocodile skin). They are all beautiful once you get past your squirming
uneasiness with crocodile skin (especially the bags with the whole crocodile on
it, how disgusting and ugly!). I only found about two styles that I liked
though and while they cost only a fraction of what they would be had they
carried Dior or Hermès logos, I resisted buying any. Maybe on
another trip.
I walked on and noticed there were many Russians
in the city. They were everywhere! Even the travel agencies seem to be
Russian-owned and some restaurant had menus in Cyrillic. The city was also
expanding rapidly and I came upon a building under construction every 50 metres
or less. And yes, the numerous exotic leather shops too and it made me wonder
how many crocodiles they breed and kill every year. There were also shops
selling the local offerings like coffee luwak and agarwood jewellery and
another orange-coloured prayer beads/bracelets (I didn’t go near to have a
closer look). There were also the usual massage parlours, beauty and skincare shops,
restaurants. One thing that was missing was foreign currency exchange offices
though and as I walked on, I began to worry. I only had some leftover balance
from my last trip to Vietnam and had used some for the bus fare.
After
a while, I came to a major road. I waited at the lights before crossing over to
Viễn Đông
Hotel. I went in to ask and the lady at the reception said I could change money
there. The rate was VND22K for USD1 so I changed USD50 (in denominations of
USD20 and USD10). I went out and guess what? BaoViet Bank was just right next
to the hotel. I went in and found I could change money there. I asked the rate
and when I found the bank offered better rates at VND22,920 for every USD1 (for
notes smaller than USD50), I went back to the hotel and said I changed my mind
and wanted my money back. The lady was not happy of course but after a couple
of minutes, I managed to persuade her to return my USD50 and I gave her back
the Dong. Alas for me, the bank had closed within those couple of minutes as it
was already 16:30. Oh well. I could return the next morning. Banks operate
there on Saturdays anyway.
I
walked on and after a couple of blocks only noticed bus stop for the airport
bus. I hadn’t seen any bus stops before then and wondered if I had missed them
or if the bus followed a different route. I walked on to the airport bus
station at no. 10, Yersin Street and left after ascertaining the schedule. I
walked on to Cho Dam (Dam Market) but it was starting to close then (a stall
keeper told me in halting English that the market opens early and closes at 17:30
every day). There were stalls selling ready-t-eat seafood snacks outside the
market. I left the market and stumbled upon an adjacent building which sold
mainly dried seafood. The stalls here were still operating when I left half an
hour later.
I
left the market area and walked south to Le Loi and then Pasteur. There were
more roadside operators now that it was early evening selling mainly food. I came
across one such stall at Pasteur with what looked like a small whole animal
being grilled. A piglet? Or a small dog? I hurriedly walked past without
checking further.
I
then walked along the beach. There were so many people on the beach and in the
sea! The beach stretched for about 1.5 km and there must be easily a thousand
people there and, no, I’m not exaggerating. But I was amazed to find the beach
very clean. I could hardly find any rubbish anywhere. This is one thing Malaysians
can learn from our neighbours. Promoting tourism is one thing, keeping
cleanliness a matter of principle, a more important thing. There wasn’t much of
a sunset because the sea was facing east.
I
crossed over to Nha Trang Centre and found more outlets selling crocodile skin
bags. I learnt that bags made from skin from the crocodile belly cost more than
those made from its back. I learnt that the scales can tell you how old the
crocodile was: the bigger the more adult it was. And that one crocodile is used
for one bag. Imagine that! Imagine how many crocodiles are killed each year! While crocodiles are one of my least favourite animals, I would still love to own a
Birkin or Kelly in crocodile or alligator skin but the sight of so many dead
crocodiles in one place depressed me. I left the mall after buying a 6-litre
bottle of mineral water and struggled with it back to my hotel.
I
stumbled upon the Chay Banh Mi Stall which I had read sold vegetarian buns.
Chay means vegetarian and banh means bread (from bun I suppose). So if you’re
in Vietnam and want to find vegetarian restaurant, look for the word Chay. I went
to my room first to deposit the water bottle before going out again to buy
vegetarian bun for dinner. It was surprisingly filling, Alhamdulillah.
I
watched a bit of Wimbledon before turning in.
Saturday,
7 July 2018
I
slept again after waking up for morning prayers and got up at 07:30. After calling
my niece and talking to my sis and dad, I walked to Trần Phú to find the airport bus stop and was happy to find one 7
minutes away. I then turned back and set off for BaoViet Bank where I changed
USD60 (I would need some money for an upcoming trip). Then I crossed to a mall
diagonally across before walking on to the Cathedral. I wanted to enter but morning
visiting hours ended at 11:00 so I left and walked to Huynh Thuc Khang. I intended
to have lunch at Bo De, a vegetarian restaurant there but on the way there
stopped at a blind massage place. The prices were 20% lower than the average in
the main tourist thoroughfare so I decided to have a massage. I asked for hot
stone add-on and that cost VND10K extra. All in all, I paid only VND90K or less
than USD4! It was a basic place and I shared a three-bedded room. My masseuse
came a few minutes later and spent the first 10 minutes on the phone while
massaging my head. She stopped after that and my experience improved.
I
left within the hour and made my way to Bo De. I was sufficiently hungry by
then and ordered a spring roll and some noodle soup. The spring roll was huge! My
lunch cost VND37K but I only had VND36K in small change and the owner waved me
off indicating it was OK. I thanked him and left.
Cho
Xom Moi was just a few steps away and I went in to check it out. It sold fresh
vegetables and seafood and some clothes. I didn’t stay long here. I decided to
return to my hotel to seek refuge from the sun and made my way back.
I
ventured out again in late afternoon and walked to a small lane next to a
construction site with stalls lining both sides of the alley a la night market.
I had noticed they sell a lot of mango ‘cakes’, cashew nuts, and other food
stuff like durian and jackfruit sweets and snacks. I walked up and down the
lane and left with some cashew nuts. I dropped by Chay Banh Mi Stall for
another vegetarian bun, this time with cheese. Then I returned to my room to
finish packing and rest.
Sunday,
8 July 2018
I
slept after morning prayers and woke up at 07:30. After breakfast, I read my
novel. I checked out and left the hotel at 09:15 and walked to the bus stop. There
was a lot of traffic that early on Sunday morning. After a while, a Filipino
girl came along and asked for the airport bus stop. I told her I was waiting
for the bus too. We chatted while waiting and she told me that she took a cab
from the airport to the city and it cost her VND500,000 which was 10 times more
than a one-way bus fare!
The
bus arrived and we boarded. It was a 40-minute ride to the airport and the last
stop was the domestic airport. It was only a 5-minute covered walk to the
international terminal so it wasn’t a problem. I wanted to go through passport
control but was told to queue at the counter. It turned out that some system
was down and our boarding passes for online check-in couldn’t be accepted. I had
to queue a while to get the counter to print the usual boarding pass. While the
passport control was fairly quick, security check was slow as we had to shed
off our footwear. Ugh.
I
browsed the shops before making my way to the gate. We were called to board
quite late and again had to board a bus to the plane. We took off half an hour
later than scheduled and as a result, landed half an hour late at KLIA 2. I rushed
through the terminal to the autogate – I don’t understand those who shuffle and
dawdle when they have sat for two hours in the plane. So thankful I didn’t have
to join the queue for passport control as it was longggg. After performing
prayers, I went to find the bus back to KL Sentral and managed to board a few
minutes before it left. The traffic from KLIA 2 was bad too.
I
quite like Nha Trang. I didn’t see any Malays there unlike in Saigon where every
third person is Malay. That’s great because you don’t travel to a foreign land
to meet familiar faces. I found two halal restaurants (one was Persian or sth
and the other Indian) but I decided I wanted to try the local fare because I was
there to experience the local flavour. I have a feeling I might just make
another trip there, if only to buy a crocodile leather bag, have a massage and have
some vegetarian meal –although it means I have to fly cattle airline again.
SCRIBBLED BY
ADEK FÀB
at
7/16/2018 01:53:00 pm
|
Wednesday, June 20, 2018
Thursday, June 14, 2018
A Bear* To Cross
So
another World Cup is upon us but I don’t plan on watching as many matches as I
avidly did in the previous World Cups because of the host country’s invasion of
Ukraine, annexation of Crimea and military intervention in Syria. I’m not even
excited to watch Germany play and it’s just not a World Cup without Italy
anyway. My action may be an isolated insignificant attempt but what I don’t
understand is how some people can be so vocal about the inhuman conditions that
migrant workers labour in in Qatar but fail to acknowledge the far more serious
atrocities done by the Russians. The blood of thousands of murdered Syrians
soaks Syrian soil but hey if you have money to host a sporting event, you can
continue to slaughter civilians with impunity and get away with genocide. Sick!
*
The Russian bear is a widespread symbol for Russia.
And
another Syawal is upon us after a month of abstinence, control, restraint,
patience, reflection, appreciation and ibadah. Well, actually I’m not sure if
we have been exercising restraint and control if the crowds at the bazaars are
any indication. Just because we fast for a month doesn’t mean we have to
celebrate Eid for a month but some people have the notion that’s how it should
be and so Syawal becomes a month of wastage, much flaunting and excess. Muslims
in other countries celebrate Eid for maybe a couple of days tops but of course Malay
Muslims have to get some kind of payback for having to suffer in Ramadan. Come
now, in this era of New Malaysia, let’s exercise prudence and not go to
extremes or be extravagant.
I
feel sad as Ramadan slips away. I’ll never be ready for Ramadan despite it
arriving every year but when it draws to an end, I just feel sad. Please grant
me another Ramadan, Allah. Ameen.
Eid
Mubarak, everyone.
SCRIBBLED BY
ADEK FÀB
at
6/14/2018 01:09:00 pm
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Labels: RANTS, REFLECTIONS
Monday, June 11, 2018
Parts Unknown
In the space of three days last week, we received news that Kate Spade and then Anthony Bourdain had ended their lives. None of us will ever know why they decided to exit this world the way they did and when they did it. Is it because they want to have some form of ‘control’ over their lives that they want to also be able to control when and how they die? Is it because life has become even more intolerable even for them? Why do people who seemingly have it all – fame, money, an enviable lifestyle – choose to end their lives this way? Do they think that their problems are so bad that life is no longer worth living, that the easiest thing to do is to check out regardless of the consequences this would have among their loved ones?
There had been a time when I would look at the river and wonder how it would feel like to throw myself over the bridge. This was a long, long time ago and while I wasn’t suicidal, I did wonder what would happen if I let myself fall into the water below. I’m thankful I have my faith to stop me from any suicidal thoughts and crazy acts but I still couldn’t help wondering. I also think those who end their lives are actually brave to do it because the coward that I am would never be able to hurt or inflict pain on myself. This does not mean that I condone their action in any way. Sure, life gets to us all. No one is so unique as to be spared life’s problems but to end my life would feel like an ungrateful act to Allah who gave me this life. And besides, I’m not that selfish enough to do that to my parents and family and loved ones.
Depression, life issues, health problems, family and/or marital problems, disorder (bipolar, borderline personality, Asperger’s and other types of disorder). Who don’t have any one or a combination of these? Some even have problems which tick all the boxes but still they have a passion for life. This is what makes Bourdain’s suicide puzzling to me. He appeared so passionate and hungry for life and that’s what makes his suicide especially hard to grasp. It just shows that people also may have parts unknown where they need help. But they must also know that they should seek for help. They should not be embarrassed to be seen to be asking for help.
So if you or know someone who have parts unknown to others, do reach out and seek help. Don’t let yourself drift deeper into the parts unknown. If you don’t like human company, you might consider getting a pet: a cat, some fish, guinea pig, or hamster. Pet therapy has been proven to treat mental illness. On my part, I also find it helpful to talk and confide to Allah. I understand some of us are private people who don’t like to unburden our problems onto others, who don’t want to trouble and worry others, who are secretive or just have trust issues with others so talking to a Higher Being would really help. Similarly, if you know someone suffering, pay attention and listen to them. Show empathy and not judgement. Make them feel that they’re not as alone as they think. We can all help each other.
This life is never meant to be a rose garden. We will always be tested in one way or another. That’s just how life is. Life can be frustrating, depressing and upsetting and it can drag you down but it can also be wonderful and fulfilling. While it’s all too easy to just give up and want to die, know that life is always a better alternative to death (unless you have terminal disease). Life is such a precious gift that we should cherish every moment. It’s a blessing to be alive and be able to impact other lives. We can all contribute while we’re alive (just look at Tun M!). Besides, you never know whose life you’re touching. So let’s choose to live and try to make it a worthy meaningful life. Ask any of the refugees fleeing for their lives and risking their lives while trying to save themselves and I’m sure they will tell you they all want to live despite everything they have lost. As for me, like a line from Bon Jovi’s It’s My life, ¯I just want to live while I’m alive...¯
SCRIBBLED BY
ADEK FÀB
at
6/11/2018 05:17:00 pm
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Labels: LIFE, RANTS, REFLECTIONS
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