It’s
all too easy for me to –
Admit
defeat.
Blame
others, the world, God, circumstances, the universe, everything and everyone
else but myself.
Feel
sorry for myself.
Just
give up.
Stop
trying.
Surrender.
Think
the world is against me and nothing I do is ever good enough.
Think
I’m a failure. Failure to Launch for one.
And
yes, sometimes, I feel weighed down and overwhelmed by my responsibilities. I also
admit that I have a problem with relationships, specifically staying in one. I’m
not sure if it’s because of the ghosts of the beaux past and the pain endured
after each relationship ended or if it’s just me who’s afraid of being hurt and
reluctant to commit.
I
do have my ups and downs, my bad days when I feel I’ve lost my mojo and it
takes a few days at most for me to get my groove back and snap out of it. And while
it’s only too easy to just give up, I won’t. Because God will always test us
all anyway and it’s not how you fall or fail but how you pick yourself up and
mend that matters. This is life after all. It’s never going to be a breeze, a
rose garden, smooth without any bumps. Life will always throw you a curveball
when you least expect it and are least prepared for it.
Just
understand and give me space when I’m down and in the doldrums. Because it’s
never easy to bounce back but bounce back I will, insyaAllah.
On
another totally different note: Happy Independence Day, Malaysia.
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