Sometimes

Sometimes I despair

I don’t know what to do

Don’t know what I can do

Sometimes I’m at a loss

I feel helpless and powerless

I feel overwhelmed at life’s challenges

I don’t want to stress myself and over-worry over things I can’t control

But I just can’t help worrying sometimes

Sometimes I just want to shout out aloud

I just want to cry my heart out

I wish I can run away to the furthest corner of the world

Sometimes I feel so misunderstood

I know I can appear aloof

But I do value my privacy just like everyone else

Sometimes I just want to give up, I want to give in

I just want to throw in the sponge

And it’s all I can do to keep my sanity

Sometimes I get tired of trying to be strong

Of trying too hard and doing so much

I wish people will understand what I’m going through

Sometimes I feel like crying when I look at my dad

And it makes me wonder if longevity is worth the suffering that comes with it

It’s not worth the hype, I guess

But how can anyone complain to Allah for being granted a long life

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Sometimes I feel so insecure

I am torn and undecided

Do I want in or out

Sometimes I just want to be left all alone

Other times I wonder if I can make it on my own

Sometimes I’m just sick of men

Of the promises made, dreams shared

Sometimes I wish I was a man myself.