Where Did The Love Go?

Two years ago, a close friend emailed me to tell that her husband was divorcing her. She only told me a couple of months after it took place, because well, how does one go about telling sth like that anyway? They were married for almost 4 years. She was trying for a baby, which is only natural for married couples. He was trying to get his old life back. When he was offered a higher 5-figure salary [for most of us, that's a lot of money surely], she suggested he took it up. He did. And the problems that had been lurking seemed to have gotten worse.

He went out almost all day all week [and that included weekends]. She was beginning to think that maybe he only found it thrilling to chase her while they were courting but not to be tied down to her. Or perhaps the rituals of marriage had gotten to him. Then, one fine day, he dropped the bomb. And would you believe it, he wanted to go to work the very next day. My friend's relatives took emergency leave and congregated at their house to deal with the situation and he wanted to go to work! But stubborn man he is, he did go to office.

A few days later, my friend tested positive for pregnancy. He refused to be swayed. I suppose, in a way, that's a good thing cos you don't want your spouse to be an unwilling parent. And it wouldn't be right to try to make someone stay in a marriage when he or she no longer wants to. They proceeded with the divorce.

My friend, the strong girl she is, took everything in stride. The pregnancy, the divorce proceedings, trying to sell off the house etc. When I went to visit her with a friend one weekend, she didn't even cry at her misfortune. Occasionally her voice shook of course but she remained strong. She even went ahead with her exam! She explained she took the professional paper to get her mind off the domestic problems [even before he insisted on divorce]. By the way, she passed her paper.

Baby was born early 2004. He actually came to the hospital and got an earful from ex-mother-in-law. Ha, served him right! I wouldn't have been as sympathetic and would probably throw in some punches and kick his balls!

My friend is now happy with her life. She still hasn't trusted men. We did ponder why he wanted the divorce so badly. The most obvious thing that came to mind was there was another girl. But no, there wasn't. Or maybe there are some other girls [in plural]. After all, the new job, the new salary, the new Beemer he's driving are incentive enough to make him want to change his life as well. He gets to visit the child, but for a maximum of two hours or so, and under the close supervision of either my friend or her mother.

Two years later, another good friend told me the same thing. That she just got divorced early in the year. She's a Zambian, working in the Netherlands. He is a Caucasian. They were staying together for some time before deciding to make it legal. She learnt the Dutch driving system, the language and overcame racial challenges in securing a job. She eventually landed a good job shortly after they tied the knot.

Some time last year, in one of our increasingly rare emails to each other, she mentioned that the first year of marriage had been a turbulent one. She was totally disillusioned but they were still trying things out. I suppose they both have different pursuits in life. But why weren't these problems previously? I could only prayed the best for her.

The marriage broke down completely with no room for salvage. She could now see that they are not compatible and puzzles over how they even got together in the first place. It's a good thing her job is challenging and rewarding, and that she has her son [from a previous relationship] to occupy her. At least she sounds happier and consumed with her new life now.

God works in mysterious ways. He knows what's best for us. We'll just have to have faith in Him.

Good Morning Vietnam!

I was feeling rather restless as I always do whenever I'm contemplating a trip. When the MATTA fair was held in September 2005, I went there in enthusiasm, hopeful of bargain trips to some exotic destinations. Alas, most of the tour packages on sale then were for November/December departures. I don't fancy travelling then as it's school holidays period and there will be too many travellers - the local people want to make their escape while the foreign tourists also want to get away from the northern hemisphere winter and the southern hemisphere summer.

On a spur of the moment days after the MATTA Fair had ended, I called the MAS Golden Holidays to enquire on a possible trip to Ho Chi Minh City [aka Saigon] in Vietnam. Now you may ask why I chose this city. Good question, really. Maybe because I once saw a programme on NTV 7 where the host travelled to Vietnam. Also I read previously, in the May 2004 edition of the National Geographic magazine, an article on Hanoi, the capital of Vietnam [it's about 1600 km away from HCMC or so I was told], how it's rebuilding itself after the Vietnam war etc. I chose HCMC over Hanoi after recalling vaguely the beautiful buildings and surroundings captured when Explorace was held there. Anyway, luckily for me, MAS Golden Holidays do have free & easy packages to HCMC. I chose a 4D/3N package with additional two tours thrown in - a half-day city tour and a full day tour to the Mekong Delta/Vinh Long with lunch. Abah, probably recalling their Myanmar tour in 2002, decided not to come along.Day 1/1 October 2005
Departed on Saturday morning, 1 October 2005. Flight was at 0905 hours. An hour and 45 minutes later, we landed at Tan Son Nhat Airport. By the way, HCMC is an hour behind. I remember thinking that it looked like the rain just stopped 10 minutes earlier. Clearing custom was a breeze and collecting our baggage from what appeared to be the only carousel there, we stepped out and I was relieved to see someone holding a placard with my mummy's name on it. We were led to a white Toyota Vios and some 20 minutes later arrived at our hotel, the Chancery Saigon in district 3 of the city. It's part of the Best Western chain. Our room overlooked Tao Dan Park, much to my joy.







After checking in and settling our luggage in the room, we decided to check out the surroundings. Armed with a map which i requested from the receptionist, we set out. Traffic consisted mainly of motorcycles and there must be thousands of them with the majority of motor cyclists not sporting any helmets! The motor cyclists and pillion riders have fashioned a half-face mask [think of those surgical masks donned during the haze but more fashionable with colourful prints of cotton cloth] to wear during their rides. My Singaporean friend who just visited Hanoi in mid-September informed that it isn't anywhere as suicidal to cross the street as foreigners would initially think and he was right. In fact, the motor cyclists were quite courteous: while they did use the horn and occasionally run the red light, they would slow down and/or try to avoid you when they see you trying to cross. Thankfully I've had some practise jaywalking on our local roads ;). The word 'orderly chaos' came to mind often.The map proved to be inadequate and we couldn't find the Central Post Office after twenty minutes of walking. I attempted to ask some school students at a bus stop. Now the Vietnamese are really friendly people and some guy even came to try help us out even though he couldn't speak English. Finally we asked how to get to the Ben Thanh Market. Miraculously, a bus came along and yes, it would pass the Ben Thanh Market. The bus fare cost VND2000 each [about 50 sen or USD0.126]. Ben Thanh Market is the city's main market with aisles tightly arranged according to products. The products would largely appeal to the female visitors - beaded shoes, jewellery, tablecloth, lacquerware, textiles... and even marine products [dried shrimps, sea cucumbers etc etc]! We returned to the hotel by cab. Later, I ventured out alone in search of a supermarket to buy some groceries.Day 2/2 October 2005

The next day, after breakfast, we met our local tour guide who introduced himself as Le Kha [Le is the surname and Kha, his name] & driver [sorry, didn't quite catch the name] came to meet us. They first brought us to the Reunification Palace. It's not a beautiful building and was (re)built in 1962 on the bombing remains - which by the way was an assassination attempt on the President - of the old Presidential Palace, which was first built in 1868. It has been renamed the Reunification Palace after Communist tanks from North Vietnam smashed
through the gates of the Palace on 30 April 1975, overtaking Saigon and ending the war at long last. There are 6 levels, including 2 levels of basement. We were shown the various conference rooms, the Presidential Receiving Room, basement tunnels and war room, telecommunications centre and even the kitchen[!] as well as a back terrace complete with heliport.Next stop is the War Remnants Museum. It highlights the suffering endured by the Vietnamese at the hands of the American forces. It was a sobering experience what with photographs of the injured, hunted and killed [not necessarily in that order], spreading of chemicals [Agent Orange and even torturing of prisoners. It just drives home the fact that war is unnecessary, senseless, ugly and downright brutal.After the sobering first two sites, we then proceeded to the Notre Dame Cathedral which is situated in the Paris Square in the heart of HCMC. The cathedral was renamed Notre Dame with approval from the Vatican in 1959. 70% of the Vietnamese are Mahayana Buddhists, 20% Catholic and 10% other religions. Adjacent to the cathedral is the Central Post Office. It resembles a grand railway station and is open daily. You can't miss the huge portrait of President Ho Chi Minh at the end of the central hall.




We then walked past the Continental Hotel - built in 1880, it's the oldest hotel in HCMC, very beautiful and charming from outside - to the Municipal Theatre, a beautifully restored opera house which is yet another building left by the French.


The city hall, another fantastic example of colonial architecture, is just nearby and the bronze statue of President Ho Chi Minh with a girl sits in the square with their back to the city hall. By this time, dark clouds had gathered overhead. We hurried over to Tayson Lacquerware factory which specialises in producing high quality lacquerware, wooden carved
products and other handicrafts. Admiring
the beautiful lacquerware pieces on display [while some are big and bulky, they are actually quite light], we were vaguely aware that it had started to pour very heavily outside! Kha borrowed a big umbrella and the three of us went back into the car. As Kha had explained earlier, rain in HCMC doesn't last long and normally stop after 20-30 minutes. We then went to the Blue Ginger Restaurant for lunch. Only then did I realise how famished I was! Lunch was delicious.After lunch we proceeded to Cholon, HCMC's very own Chinatown. Kha informed that three districts make up Chinatown. There are about 1 million Cantonese-speaking Chinese in Vietnam, mainly concentrated in HCMC and South Vietnam. The heart of the Chinatown is the Binh Tay Market. Apart from the nice courtyard of trees at the centre of the market, I wasn't too impressed with the narrow aisles and the noisy crowd. we left after probably 20 minutes. Kha agreed to let us down at the Ben Thanh Market on our way back for more serious shopping and haggling.Went out for a stroll at almost 5 in the evening. Visited the Diamond Plaza, a modern departmental store. We then traipsed along Dong Khoi up to Sheraton Saigon Hotel at Dong Du street. A few metres away from the posh Sheraton is Masjid al-Rahim. Muslim travellers can eat at Bombay Restaurant in front of Sheraton or at a stall behind the masjid itself [in the masjid compound]. Also i was told there's a satay house at 35 Mac Dinh Chi St and Bon Mua aka Four Season Restaurant at no. 2, Thi Sach St.Additional info: there are 24 districts in HCMC. HCMC population [2004] = 8 m, population of motorcycles [2004] = 3 m [!!]. Saigon was the capital of South Vietnam from 1954 - 1975. There are 54 ethnic groups in Vietnam which the majority living in the mountains which form kind of a backbone to the country.Day 3/3 October 2005After breakfast, we journeyed to the Mekong Delta at Vinh Long province, about 130 km southwest of HCMC. It took about 2.5 hours to get there and we passed small towns and paddy fields all the way [quite unlike travelling from KL to, say, Batu Pahat where the scenery is alternatively punctuated by towns, factories, plantations and jungle]. I was surprised to see tombs in some paddy fields! According to Kha, yes, they actually used to bury the dead in the paddy fields. some shops along the roads sell rice wine - there are two types of rice wine, the white one [made from rice] and the red [made from sticky rice]. The alcohol content is 45%! Most food stalls along the road also serve as 'hammock hotel'. Kha explained that as most Vietnamese travel by motorcycles, these stalls provide hammocks to the travellers to rest their weary limbs - FOC as long as you buy some drink/food. Interesting concept! I remarked on the red flags of yellow hammer and sickle which are hung almost everywhere [similar to the previous Soviet flags] but Kha informed that those flags are emblems of communism as Vietnam is a communist country. Kha then explained that the 4 most important persons in Vietnam are the President, Prime Minister, Chairman of the National Assembly and the Secretary-General of the Communist Party. Election is held every four years for members of the National Assembly, who in turn elect the President. President can only be in office for 2 terms, except for President Ho Chi Minh who was in power from 1954 [after the Geneva conference which divided Vietnam at the 17th parallel] to 1969. Unfortunately, he died before he could see Vietnam reunified. For more history lesson, visit http://www.moreorless.au.com/heroes/ho.html.


The centre of the Mekong Delta, Vinh Long is situated between the Tien and the Hau rivers [two main branches of the Mekong River]. The rich soil here is favourable for rice and various fruit [rambutan, pomelo, banana, longan...] and cultivation of other crops [sweet potato, yam]. The majority of inhabitants live on farming, the remaining on trading. According to Kha, there are many farms in the Mekong Delta: fish farms, shrimp farms, crocodile and snake farms [for leather] and of course fruit orchards.Vinh Long is close to the Tien river in the North, Can Tho - Dong Thap provinces in the West, Ben Tre province in the East, and Tra Vinh province in the South. More than 97% of the population is Khmer and Hoa. The river is massive and brown in colour but very, very clean - hardly a litter in sight! There are many beautiful small islands in the river. We took a boat along the river, stopping at a poprice 'factory', a traditional house - where we were treated to local fruits, traditional music and songs, and finally an orchard/nursery for lunch. The whole boat trip took some 3 hours - yes, it is a very big river and even then, we only travelled in the Mekong Delta! Apparently Mekong River is the 4th longest in the world - 4200 km long. We then returned to HCMC.






Some basic facts: the Mekong Delta comprises 12 provinces with over 17 million people [!]. You can travel downstream to the South China Sea or upstream to Cambodia. Mekong River means Mother River in Cambodian. Its origin is in China, near Tibet. It travels through China, Myanmar, Laos, Cambodia and Vietnam before emptying out into the South China Sea. As there are clearly many stakeholders involved/affected, there are many demands placed on the river.
Additional info: Vietnam is the world's second largest exporter of coffee and second largest exporter of rice after Thailand [80% of rice come from the Mekong Delta itself].
Day 4/4 October 2005

We left after breakfast for the airport. Morning traffic was already building and the driver didn't wish to get stuck in the jam and delay us further. There were more senders than actual passengers outside the airport ;) and we quickly proceeded to check in our luggage [mummy has this thing about sitting in front seats]. My travel agent once told me though that back seats are safer in the event of emergency - so does that mean that those in the Business and First Class will perish first? Hmmm... Anyway, visitors must pay a departure tax of USD12 or its equivalent in VND [there's a desk at the ground and 1st floors to pay this tax]. A few duty-free shops, a cafe, a waiting area are available after the Immigration counter.

The flight took off after 1100 and we reached KL 1340 hours.

Ni Hao!

Originally posted on Thu, 9 June 2005.

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just want to share my trip to beijing. actually i was supposed to go with mummy, lin and her sister, but things happened. mummy had to undergo surgery in early april. 2 weeks before our departure date, the agent called to say that they could only offer us beijing/tianjin/chengde trip [instead of beijing/shanghai and a few other towns thrown in which we initially signed up for] as some people had withdrawn from the tour and that the trip dates would be a few days later than planned.

lin & her sister had no problems with the new dates but i wasn't comfortable. so i spent the remainder of the friday afternoon finding other agents and alhamdulillah managed to find one organising a muslim tour [our 1st agent does not offer a muslim tour]. so i joined this tour bymyself; lin & her sister proceeded with the 1st agency. although it's a muslim tour, there were 5 chinese and 2 indian ladies joining the tour.

left KUL just after midnight on thursday [so it was technically already friday,20 may 2005]. we flew air china. funny folks they have on board there as cabin crew. the 'economoney' class somehow seemed smaller in comparison to MAS and they tried serving us some meal [supper, i shd think] an hour after take-off. at that hour of the day, sleep was foremost in my mind... the crew also quietly went about with the drinks and if you were halfway into slumberland, you'd miss them. they must have made two trips up and down the aisle, once after take-off and once before. alhamdulillah i brought some mineral water or i would have arrived dehydrated!

arrived at 6.30 am and it was so bright already! cleared through customs and retrieved bags. the tour guide met us at the arrival hall, introducing himself as nicholas. he spoke quite good english. apparently may is the best time to visit beijing as it gets too hot fr june onwards [also rainy season falls in summer] and other months nov-april could be too cold [travel agent told me the same when i asked why june tour prices looked so cheap]. we then boarded a coach and went to a muslim restaurant for breakfast. the traffic was already building and the roads were filled with cars - loads of them with VWs being the firm favourites, all made in china; bicycles [abt 11 million of them in a city of 13 million people!]; buses - some looking so not road-worthy, most looking ok, the city is after all preparing for the 2008 olympics; taxis [same as buses, some very modern, some quite drab] and people, people everywhere. beijing is eight times the size of Hong Kong.

after breakfast, went to the summer palace. the area's quite massive. it has a man-made lake and we took a boat across the lake. i remember wondering why i couldn't seem to see any fish in the lake. i could see lots of algae-like plants though. the breezy boat-ride was comfortable and sure did wonders for appetite.


went to another muslim restaurant for lunch. we were besieged by street peddlers as we waited for the bus to get to the restaurants and also when we arrived at the restaurant. i felt bad for not purchasing anything but whatever they were selling didn't look particularly appealing or useful, at least to me. we were then ferried to our hotel [phew!] for a brief rest. that evening, we convened at the lobby, went for dinner at yet another muslim restaurant and then went for an acrobatic show. i didn't think i would enjoy it that much and i was pleasantly surprised that it turned out to be very entertaining. in short, i was mesmerised! but my soft side again prevailed -couldn't help feeling sad for the small girls [about 3 of them, roughly abt 6/7years of age]. somehow seemed like child abuse to me! i mean, what kind of life do they lead anyway, practising by day and performing by night, every day of their short childhood? my consolation is if they don't know what they're missing, then they probably [and hopefully] won't miss it.

day two [saturday]: cloudy start to the day. after breakfast [mainly porridge and if one's lucky, some fried rice], went to the Government Jade Factory. apparently this is the best place to buy jade [and where you can purchase jade at the lowest price. it supplies to other private shops and we were told that it would cost us more if we purchase jade at private shops]. now, there are three classes of hard jade: A, B and C. A is the most expensive but according to nicholas, not necessarily the most beautiful pieces. you can tell the difference by holding a piece of jade against the light or by beating against it. if it has a clear sound, it is of A class.

we then went to a Crystal Factory [aka Crystal Palace...haha!], surprise, surprise it's also Govt-owned. i wasn't too impressed with the items on display; i'm sure that we have better ones in KL. the non-muslims then went to the Ming Tomb; the muslims went for lunch and there's a prayer room near the restaurant [they even provided slippers to enable us perform our ablutions!]. the group reassembled at 2 pm and we then left for the Juyongguan Great Wall.


the Great Wall spans 6700km and if i'm not mistaken, it was built by the first emperor of the Qing Dynasty to prevent attacks from enemies from the north. there's a watching tower every 400m. from afar, i could see it was going to be a steep climb. thankfully, our group spent 3 hours there, allowing those who wanted to climb to the top ample time to do. nicholas said it takes him an average of an hour to climb and it took us exactly that! good thing too that it wasn't too hot then, the clouds were only starting to clear from the morning rain.

day three [sunday]: went to the beijing zoo early in the morning to see the panda. pandas normally get up around 8 or so, are fed their breakfast of bamboo shoots and after that they have a long nap. so it's essential, according to nicholas, that we arrive early to see them, otherwise, they'd already be sleeping off their breakfast.




next, we headed for the China Preserving Health Training Centre where we each got a free health check [just by checking our pulses and palms! but still amazingly accurate!] following which we were recommended pills. they don't come cheap though, ranging from 520 yuan [~RM260] to thousands of yuan! after that we were given a brief massage followed by a longer foot massage. after the Great Wall climb, this was a welcome. spent a good part of the morning there. all the massaging made us very hungry so we proceeded to lunch and after that, to a nearby masjid. it looked like any traditional chinese structure, save for the spire.










Forbidden City was our next destination, we entered it from the North Gate and walked across it to the South Gate. some facts about the Forbidden City: distance from one end to another - 960 metres[!] from East to West, it is 750 metres wide. total size: about 72 hectares. built in 1406-1420 during the third emperor. a total of 24 emperors [or 500 years] lived there. a few of my fellow travellers were already complaining by the time we exited the South Gate. they never imagined they'd be walking so much in beijing!

we then passed the Mao Zedong [sp?] Gate and crossed the road to Tianenmen Square. it's massive! the body of the great Chairman Mao lies in a mausoleum behind the monument and according to nicholas, his coffin is made of cystal. after all those walk above the ground, we then went to the Underground City [aka Great Wall City, so called bcos the length of the entire underground city is longer than the Great Wall!!]. it was constructed, by hand [china didn't have modern machinery then and very little money too], in the late 1960s to house citizens in case of attack from the Soviets [as it was known then]. it could accommodate up to 100, 000 people down there and besides houses, it also has hospitals, theatres, factories, schools... we were not allowed to take pictures or capture images on video down there. very strict! most sections of the u/ground city have been blocked but the guide explained that one could actually walk along a corridor all the way to the great wall [3 days' walk], another corridor to tianjin [a city 1.5 hours' drive away - this could take 7 days & 7 nights of walking], and yet another leading to the forbidden city. we were led down one corridor and we found ourselves in a minisilk-factory [we were no longer surprised].

day four [monday]: the morning traffic was back again! this morning, we went to the Bang Fa Chun Pearl Store, and yes, you guess it, another Govt-owned factory.[i was beginning to wonder if our itinerary was also drawn up by the Govt]. the pearl all come from fresh-water oysters, which they apparently breed in the lake of the summer palace. aha! that was probably why i didn't see any fish at all in the lake. i love pearl and the jewellery displays were just amazing. however, i read previously that salt-water pearls are more exclusive than fresh-water pearls as the former are harder to obtain.

we were then taken to the bell museum [which as the name suggests, is a museum for bells of all sizes. it also houses the largets bell in the world]. there's this one gigantic bell which they ring every New Year [not Lunar NewYear/chinese new year]. one could, if so wish, pay thousands of yuan for the privilege of ringing this bell [it costs more the first time, and the cost reduces with every successful attempt to ring the bell]. we next visited Dr Tea, a tea house [and yes, owned by the Govt] selling all kinds of tea, very expensive too! we were given samples of each tea. after lunch, we went to Tianjin. after solat at a masjid, we went to the cultural street [literally just a strip of lane with peddlers lining up the street selling antiques, souvenirs, trinkets...] and to the food street. a few stores are muslim-owned so boleh membeli tanpa was was. if i'm not mistaken,some olympic games will be held in this city too. we returned to beijing after dinner.

day five [tuesday]: this morning, the muslims went to a cloissone or enamel factory [nicholas didn't mention it but i'm sure it's Govt-owned]. it looked like a dilapidated building from outside but it housed wonderful enamel pieces like gigantic vases, lion statues, jewellery etc etc. the non-muslims went to a temple nearby. after an hour or so, we reassembled and were taken to Old Beijing where we had a tricycle ride around the narrow streets of old beijing before heading for beihai park [also has a man-made lake], which is just across the street from the north gate end of the forbidden city. next destination is the sanli tun ya show market [aka silk street]. it's actually a mall-version of petaling street with 6 levels: the basement is where the shoes, belts & bag sare sold; the 1st and 2nd floors [or ground and 1st floors to us] are where the clothes are; the 3rd floor specialises in silk, bed & table linen, children's clothing; 4th flooor - pearls, crystal jewellery, cloissone products; and 5th floor food hall - with food stalls andshops selling snacks. the ladies all went crazy here, picking up bargains. i was more interested in tablelinen stuff.

me with the weak bladder found to my horror that some toilets at silk street do not have doors and yet people still do their business there oblivious to others! we spent about 1.5 hours at silk street, then we went for lunch before our journey to chengde, about 4.5 hours to the north of beijing. nicholas bade farewell to us before we left beijing and he was replaced by cindy [she didn't speak english as fluently though]. the ride to chengde was a bumpy one at times and our new driver was happy pressing the horn every few hundred metres. we saw some stretches of the great wall remains but mostly it was a poor countryside. agriculture is the main activity for miles. we stopped once for our 'toiletbreak'. finally reached chengde later in the evening. we were told that chengde has a mixed population of han, manchurians and other minorities. hotel chengde, where we spent the night, was better than the hotel in beijing.

day six [wednesday]: went to the summer resort where the royalties used to flock to escape the summer heat. this time, the lake is natural. the resort is also massive. we walked around [refused to take the boat which would cause us to part with yuan which would better be spent on shopping], it was relaxing stroll. a few suggested we leave for beijing earlier so that they could shop again. even cindy commented a few times that muslim tourists like to shop [chinese tourists just like to visit places and eat]. reached beijing, well specifically silk street, at5 pm and shopping spree began again! after dinner, we drove along chong hu street [sp?]. this street is 50 km long and apparently many corporations want to have their address there.

before we went back to the hotel, we stopped at wangfu jin street, i think it's a high class area in beijing. most shops were already closing though. reached hotel close to 11 pm.

seventh and final day [thursday]: went to men's street - also a shopping mall, despite the name. sells things similar to that at silk street. it just opened end of april 2005. not many people about. next to it is another complex called 'alien's street'. finally found artificial flowers that i wanted. after lunch, went to the airport for our journey home. arrived at KLIA 2315 pm, 26 may 2005.

that's all for now.

My Haj Trip

originally posted on Tue, 1 Mar 2005

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salamdear all
thought i'd start writing a bit of my account while in the Holy Land recently. the following is my observation & experience, not complaints, to prepare future jemaah. of course different people have different experiences. WARNING: a bit long, those not interested, do not go on.left kelana jaya on wednesday evening [12/1] about 10 pm for KLIA. escorted by police on motorbikes all the way there. departed just after midnight. arrived at King Abdul Aziz International Airport in Jeddah at 4 sth in the morning, immediately rushed for the tiny washroom to take wuduk. now don't let the name fool you, international it may claim to be but quite inefficient in the level of service. but that's saudi for you. they are not really serious about improving their services cos well, people will still come anyway. after all it's Rukun Islam. alhamdulillah cleared customs finally. after breakfast, boarded buses for Makkah [mine is among the last few flights so we would visit Madinah on the way home].arrived in makkah after Zuhur prayers. roads still jammed with jemaah back from Zuhur prayers. reached my hotel [if i may call it] 2 sth pm. to my surprise and delight, discovered that i would be sharing the room with only two other kakak despite the four beds [when i booked earlier, i was told that the only available units are those 4-5 pax/room or 6/7 pax/room. i actually wanted to book for 3 pax/room]. went for prayers in Masjidil Haram [or Haram for short] with one of the kakak. performed tawaf qudum [tawaf selamat datang] and saie haji that night - for Haji Ifrad [some performed Haji Tamattu, i.e. umrah 1st before haji so they performed tawaf umrah & saie umrah]. my roommates left a few days after wukuf as they were on the earlier flights so i got the room all to myself ;)found out a few days later the actual day for wukuf which was a day earlier than we thought. left for arafah on tuesday, 18/1. my bus was the last, so only a few of us left [everyone else had left], suspense jugak masa tu. arrived in arafah at midnight. the camp looked fine to me, each given a small mattress, a pillow and a wool blanket [it was quite cold there then].hari arafah [19/1] went along fine. left later that night for mina, hoping to stop en route at muzdalifah before reaching mina. now the distance from arafah to mina is merely 15 kms but as there were close to 3 million people all making their way to the same destination, you can well imagine the traffic. there are now a few ring roads leading to mina but not all drivers know the route [!] and some even went all the way back to Makkah but attempting to go to mina fr mekkah. alhamdulillah our bus took 5 hours to reach mina. didn't even get down at muzdalifah, just passed through it. there were those unfortunate enough when their buses took 12 - 15 hours to reach mina and the rule is that the pilgrims must be delivered from point A to point B, no stopping in between, not even for the washroom. for that duration, one can fly from KL for London and i can't imagine not visiting the washroom in that duration! but as they say, haji is a bit like preparing for the after-life: kain ihram ibarat kain kapan; ucapan talbiah ibarat ucapan talkin; wukuf di padang arafah ibarat berkumpul di padang mashyar; perjalanan ke mina ibarat meniti siratul mustaqim and so on. so terpulang kepada rezeki and nasib masing-masing. kenala berdoa and solat hajat minta dipermudahkan urusan.reached mina at 7 am. our ustaz had warned that the conditions in mina would be worse/lebih mencabar fr arafah. i can't recall the size of mina in square km but it's not big enough to accommodate 3 million people. as i went to find stones to melontar jamrah, i found that many jemaah from pakistan, india, africa, indonesia everywhere on the roads. they didn't have tents/mattresses no matter how thin/small pillows/blankets to keep them comfortable, unlike most jemaah from malaysia, brunei and singapore enjoyed. amazing really, sleeping under the stars in that weather, no privacy, people walking all around and over you... i don't know how they didn't seem to catch cold/flu! it's humbling really to see tetamu Allah from all over the world, all answering His call, coming in all manners of dressing, appearances and behaviour.i prob wouldn't have survived mina if not for the pep talks to myself [telling myself that everyone faced the same situation, and hey, i can do it], counting the hours and doa banyak2. i even contemplated doing nafar awal [leaving mina a day earlier on 12 zulhijjah] then deciding to stick it out for another 24 hours [Raha said, 24 hours je, insyaAllah boleh tahan]. my Ustaz said, mina is a 'tempat banyak syaitan and banyak cubaan/dugaan kat situ'. married couples kalau bergaduh mmg teruk kat situ but alhamdulillah i didn't witness anything unpleasant. dugaan came in all forms, from queuing for 45 minutes for the washroom and meals, to sleeping in one side for the whole night. i'm not trying to put anyone off here, the situation may well improve later on, but just be prepared for all these. i'm short-tempered and i know it so i kept reminding myself to banyak2 bersabar but i suspect those yg penyabar can turn out to be impatient over there!as some of you may recall, it rained on 12 zulhijjah, quite heavily too. Ustaz said it normally rains on 13 zulhijjah after most have left mina 'to clean up the place'. i only saw some digital pictures taken by our Ustaz of the flood, the rest i only heard and can't confirm betul or not. but what i heard is that those disabled peminta sedekah teruk jugak berusaha to save themselves; bodies bergelimpangan; street vendors' goods washed away... see, there's no outlet for the water to go. no one lives in mina except for the 3-4 days in zulhijjah.back to makkah on 13 zulhijjah. most jemaah by this time were already suffering from cough, flu, fever from mina, including yours truly. unfortunately for mekkah, people don't take care of it very well. only the Haram area is clean. elsewhere people will be spitting, throwing rubbish etc. sad really cos people don't seem to care about hygiene or cleanliness. anyway, that evening as we were waiting for Isya', suddenly there was a noise. i thought it was the sound of a very heavy sudden rain but when i looked up, to my horror, i saw the jemaah who were seconds earlier performing their tawaf running towards us. fearing the beginnings of a mini stampede, we quickly got up only to be calmed down later by someone who told us not to panic. what happened really? i don't know. the same thing happened again a few days later, just before Suboh prayers. some said that malaikat turun, wallahualam.
managed to meet up a few of my seniors - K. Yan Ali [she's now remarried to a malaysian who's been residing there for the past 11 years]; k.ainun [she's now in london]. couldn't meet up another senior as she was too ill after coming back from mina. i met up with Raha, 1 year my senior, pretty often. she's with the same travel company. as she's a doctor, i always asked her for free medical advice. oh, i also met Sherina Omar Said, a singaporean girl who did a-level together with me.
went to madinah on saturday, 12/2. i was very sad to leave Baitullah. God only knows when i can return as being single, it's quite difficult what with mahram requirements unless i tumpang my siblings. alhamdulillah for Haj, i had my brother as mahram although he didn't follow any travel agent [Tabung Haji]. he left on different dates and he flew out/into Senai as he resides in Johor. my agent is not too particular as they can always team you up with others but Tabung Haji makes it a pre-condition when a female registers that she must have a mahram. despite being alone [but not lonely! not with 3 other million people], i didn't have any problems, syukur. in fact, i found it easier to concentrate on my ibadah. cuma during ziarah & on the way to madinah were the trips boring to me cos i had to sit alone in the bus.madinah was cold for the first day or so, the winds were chilly. after that, the weather improved and it was very pleasant. madinah is a very big, modern city. very very clean too. i saw a factory outlet [sempat lagi!] on the ziarah trip [couldn't get down though ;( ]. there are a few british stores in one of the hotels adjacent to Masjid Nabawi [NEXT, Laura Ashley, BhS, mothercare, evans ...] so i was happy. but generally, madinah is slightly more expensive than mekkah and it's also more difficult to haggle for the price. also, i found that food is quite expensive; other stuff were quite reasonably priced though.all in all, i thought it was a wonderful trip and i'm glad i went when i did. true, before the trip i was a bit apprehensive about travelling alone but alhamdulillah, i didn't encounter any problems. also it's better to go when one is still young, able and energetic. i did prepare a bit like going for walks in the evenings, it sure helped with the tawaf/saie, plus mekkah is quite hilly. i know one kakak who took care of her elderly sister-in-law - whose diabetic level doubled after mina - and she and her husband had to care for the sister-in-law in hospitals for days. another kakak took care of her mother-in-law. the MIL can perform ibadah cuma tak berapa larat nak jalan so had to be wheel-chaired. i thought they're the kindest souls on earth and they just reda with their responsibilities. to be honest, i'm not sure i can say the same for myself! but mind you, there are also those travelling with their ailing/elderly parents and over there, just ignore the poor parents. in the end, ustaz/petugas were the ones who had to bring the parents beribadah. it's difficult though not impossible to beribadah once one is in wheelchair/bertongkat and almost everyone i met told me, it's good to go in one's youth.
for those who wondered, my travel agent is Rayhar. based in kemaman but they have offices in KL [PNB Darby Park, near Nikko Hotel at Jalan Ampang]. 2 of Rayhar's jemaah meninggal in Makkah. one of them was a bachelor in his late 50s [i think]. he chose to stay a bachelor to care for his parents; 1st his father passed away, then his mother. after kumpul duit for himself and also for his two parents [upah haji], he finally went together with us. he passed away a few days after wukuf before suboh and the same day he died, some tabung haji reps came to present him certificates certifying that haji was successfully done for his parents. so he died having fulfilled his responsibility as a son and he died in on of the two best places to die in. it was touching to hear his story...alhamdulillah he's fulfilled his obligations as a son.

ok, gosh this has been pretty long. just want to share my experience.

KL-Awana Kijal Treasure Hunt: Green Grass, Blue Skies, Everything Nice

originally posted on Mon, 20 Dec 2004

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salamhi all
last weekend, TheOrganisation participated in a treasure hunt [this year organised by the IRB] from Jalan Duta [IRB HQ] to awana kijal in terengganu. TheOrganisation sent 10 cars in total - 9 cars in the open category and 1 car in the VIP category. other particpiating agencies besides IRB & BNM were BSN, SC, Jab. Perkhidmatan & Penilaian Harta [JPPH], Treasury... all in all, there were 68 cars participating in the hunt and all participants were given a vest [you know, like the one donned by employees of alam flora...].my car was the last of TheOrganisation's car to roll in the IRB carpark so of course we were flagged off quite late. which was a good thing as our strategy was teamwork. in short, those ahead of us had to do the most thinking and searching and we did the verifying [smart huh!]. one car was delegated the task of buying the treasures for all cars but everyone contributed his/her ideas as to what the possible answers and treasures were. i was the navigator as usual [we've joined a few hunts together before].we stopped at genting sempah to answer some questions and after that, drove straight to kuantan using the new highway for the following questions. the weather was especially good alhamdulillah - after last week's rain & flood; i heard that the organiser even considered deferring the hunt and before that, some participants also contemplated withdrawing as they didn't fancy getting out of the car if it rained [not that i'd be happy to be searching for clues in an inch-thick mud either]. saw the remains of the flood as we drove along the coast fr kuantan to cherating and on to chukai.after submitting our answers and treasures, we went to have a meal. 3 sth in the afternoon, so it was neither lunch nor tea. we probably should have driven to KT cos we submitted our answers pretty early - easily more than 2 hours to spare! our previous hunts were normally only completed in the nick of time.awana kijal was beautiful. very breezy in the lobby and corridors [the sea was only metres away]. went for a stroll along the beach in the evening with my mates. no one was in the water as the currents were very strong. the sound of the waves always have that calming effect on me and i was really thankful to be there. green grass on one side, white sand beneath my feet, blue sea on the other side and blue skies with dots of cotton-like clouds...it's like all the troubles in the world suddenly disappeared and nothing mattered anymore. a Beautiful Day just like U2 sings it.we had the timbalan menteri kewangan [tengku putera tengku awang] gracing the dinner. after speeches, we finally were served dinner at 9 sth. results were announced after 10 pm. there were 12 prizes for the open category and 1 for VIP category. ha, you won't believe it but TheOrganisation won 9 out of 12 prizes for the open category and 1 out of 4 for VIP category. in short, all cars from TheOrganisation won! and of course by extension, TheOrganisation was the overall winner. tension semua orang lain...later that night, we had durian feast by the sea. such an enjoyable end to an exciting day...sunday morning, left at almost 10. drove to kuala kemaman to buy keropok. left kuala kemaman at 11 and drove to sg. lembing before we joined the highway. shortly before bentong, the air-cond stopped working. man, it was like sauna in the car despite the windows being rolled down! such a hot and humid day it was. we picked up a friend at sg. buloh komuter station and then drove to klang to attend a colleague's wedding. after navigating our way in and around klang, we finally found the house in the torrential rain. ironic since it didn't rain a drop on our way to the east coast [nor when we were there] but the minute we returned to klang valley, it was pouring very heavily! we finally managed to extricate ourselves at 5 sth and made our way back to TheOrganisation. home sweet home at 6.30 pm, tired but satisfied....and that was my weekend, hope yours went well too!

G'Day Mate!

originally posted on Tue, 7 Sept 2004

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just back from a trip to melbourne with my parents. departed saturday night, 28 august 2004, 2115 hours. arrived 0645, by the time we went out of the airport building, it was well past 7.30. took cab to the hotel, not exactly in city centre but a 15-minute tramride away. it works out cheaper if you travel in groups of 3 or more cos if you take the skybus, it goes to city centre and you have to take tram to the hotel - and i wasn't sure then which tram to take, what number/route and destination, which stop to alight from, how far the stop is from the hotel etc. plus with our luggage, i didn't want to take any chances. although i did print some aerial map of the hotel location, it turned out to be a very general indicator, roads that seem adjacent to the hotel on the map are actually a few blocks away!

our hotel, bayview on the park, is an affiliate of berjaya vacation club, of which i'm a member. i paid RM110/night [about AUD40.7, which i thought was very cheap for a 4-star melbourne hotel]. it faces albert park, which has this massive lake [i suspect man-made] and has a golf course too. i read somewhere that the australian F1 is held @ albert park too although i couldn't see the circuit even when i was in the park. oh yes, it was still chilly, still in winter but quite mild for winter. they declare sept 1 as the day spring started although of course theoretically, spring only starts from sept 21 [equinox].

obviously we couldn't check in when we arrived at the hotel [it was around 8 sth on sunday morning, pretty uncivilised hour to be walking around in such weather!]. the receptionist said normal check-in time is 3 pm and the earliest they could try is 11 am. my parents had already 'collapsed' at the nearest sofa in the lobby. fought off sleep but still dozed off. woke at about 10 and was about to suggest venturing to the city when we were told we could check in then. alhamdulillah! i had a pleasant surprise when i opened the door, it was a very large room with 2 double beds and a single bed [extra bed]. so much for bringing a sleeping bag! see, i thought we'd get a cramped room and as berjaya told me that extra bed costs AUD45/night, i decided to bring the sleeping bag as no way was i going to part with AUD180 for 4 nights. checked again with housekeeping and was assured i wouldn't be charged for the single bed and early check-in. alhamdulillah!!

took tram to queen victoria market. bought some souvenirs then went back. maghrib was at almost 6 then. the next day, went to nunawading [on the train map, it's at zone 2/3] to brandsmart factory outlet. there's another factory outlet but to get to this other outlet, you'll need to take the train and then bus which comes every half an hour or so, or you could walk from the train station to the outlet - for about 30-40 mins. brandsmart is pretty small by outlet standards. went back at 2 sth. rained practically the whole day. went out in the evening alone to chapel street/prahran area.

tuesday, went to richmond, about 10 minutes away fr city centre by tram. it's like a long strip of roads with small outlet shops along the road [nine west, esprit and australian brands]. after lunch, took tram back to city centre & then back to hotel 4 sth. went out alone to albert park, walked along the lake. freezing cold! mad melburnians jogging along the lake. well, in such weather, they had to be mad! wednesday, left hotel late cos i had bad menstrual pain. spent the whole day at the city centre.

thursday morning, woke up early [8 am! early la tu]. went alone to queen victoria market. bought last-minute stuff. back to hotel 11 am. cab came 1230. arrived at airport just before 1. thankfully not many people checking in yet. departed melbourne 1500 hours, arrived KUL 2045 [1/2 hour earlier than scheduled]. home at last 2230. unpacked. back to office on friday, sept 3.

other stuff: if you go to victoria, you should try rent a car [esp if you're in groups of 3 or more] or take the sightseeing bus along the great ocean road. i did that before in 2000 [with my friends] so tak menyesal that we didn't go this time around [don't think my parents are up to the long busride anyway]. go along great ocean road, up to warrnambool [sp?] go to the grampians, ballarat etc. in 2000, we rented another car and went to sydney [12 hours away], stopping at canberra on the way. canberra is a bit like putrajaya, nothing much to see. sydney, well, sydney is great! i love sydney!!! can never tire of that city. but my friends who were attending a course in melbourne - before i joined them - preferred melbourne. perth is a quiet city, too quiet for me. brisbane is ok but since i went there with my parents, didn't even go to the gold coast [well, we did go to the pacific fair factory outlet, does that count?]. anyway, lin said it pales in comparison to florida theme parks. can't comment on adelaide, darwin etc cos never been there. fashion-wise, not that great - how many australian designers do you know anyway? plus being in the southern hemisphere where the seasons are opposite that of the northern hemisphere countries probably make it harder for their designs to be accepted. they probably need to launch their designs a year ahead or sth.

ok, this has been a pretty long posting. take care everyone and have a productive week ahead.

Autumn 2002

first posted on Tue, 24 Sept 2002

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assalamualaikum, this is it. MBA is finally over [for me]. i can safely say that now that i've handed in my dissertation. i never thought that would be possible. me, write a dissertation?! i can't even write to save my life [believe me, i had to ask for my dad's help during those karangan days]!!! and yet, alhamdulillah i managed it somehow. and even exceeded the word limit! will return soon to Malaysia and before i know it, i will start working again. sigh, i'll miss being a student...but i don't think i'll ever do PhD.

gosh, time does fly, even when you're not having fun. overall, it has been a challenging yet rewarding year. i can safely say that we are a very international class and i enjoy meeting people from all over and learning so much from them. it's not just the education, it's also the experience. some of my classmates moan about the quality of the teaching staff but to me, you get what you give too. not everyone can be a good lecturer and sure, we don't have the best lecturers here. but if one keeps moaning about it rather than trying to improve on it then one won't gain anything.

i will really miss this place though. mind you, britain is not without its faults. they even have identified some people categorised as 'grumps' i.e. those between ages 35-54 who are rebellious and with little time for authority, unhappy with their lives and the world around them, whose attitude can be summed up by "life's a bitch and then you die". well, sometimes i can't blame them really. with immigrants getting better deals than the locals, i'd be mad too. for example, an immigrant family will be granted a house or flat - no questions asked - but some poor people here who register for council flats might wait for 10-15 years and still hear nothing about it. sadly too, britain is becoming 'unsafe' as the recent cases of missing teenagers have proved. here in nottingham, i hear cases of stabbing, shooting, murder almost every day. i guess it's all because of their lifestyle in a way. clubbing, partying, drinking... social problems like teenagers getting pregnant as early as 14 years old [and they have sex education]... that's what they call modern?! it just seems so empty and false to me. not to mention expensive. one night's outing can set you back by £20-25. well, enough about that. i'm sure we have those kind of people trying to emulate the western lifestyle in KL too!

right, on to some cheery note. we've been getting some sunny autumn weather the past few days. looks sunny but when you go out, you're greeted by the chilly air. that's one thing i won't miss. and while autumn can be a nice weather, it can get depressing with the trees starting to shed their leaves. before long,the trees will be bald and the streets will be littered with the falling leaves. the clothes selling these days are just the typical autumn colour: maroon, brown, mahogany... like i said, it can get pretty depressing at times... well, i better stop here... before i continue on with this depression. i really am going to miss this place...