Random Thoughts On A Rainy Evening

I firmly subscribe to the idea that we don’t stop playing because we grow old but that we grow old because we stop playing. Yes, I play pranks occasionally - not as much now as I used to regretfully - but I am aware that society frowns on what it deems childish behaviour from someone who is no longer a child. Unfortunately. Every now and then, I enjoy a good joke by playing hide-and-seek with my friends or nieces and nephew, or sometimes I hide and scare them when they pass by. I don’t see anything wrong with that as I think it’s mainly harmless and not offensive.

I do, however, take exception when people tease me or make fun of me. I truly can’t stand it and I’d react emotionally and this will just aggravate the situation further as my friends will pounce on my weakness and tease me further. I’d respond by reacting in turn and so on. Just what they want to see of course.

Yesterday, I was feeling annoyed with a mate. I usually feel irritated with him because he finds pleasure in teasing and poking me (not physically of course) – among other things, alluding I’m a Vietnamese (and let it be known that I am almost positive I don’t have any darn Vietnamese blood coursing through my veins, not that I have anything against them). He knows my weak spot and as usual, in this latest instance, attacked it mercilessly and I responded back. In my annoyance, I asked him if anyone has ever told him that he is an irksome, irritating, annoying, cocky, arrogant person. He implied I wasn’t the first person to tell him so and told me to drop the matter. I then told him that his problems are that when confronted with his weak spot, he ignores it instead of addressing it; and that when someone gives him some critique, he just brushes it off. And I couldn’t jolly well just ignore it because I was bristling inside!

He finds joy in poking me and seeing my reaction to it as he knew I would. The silly girl that I am fall for it Everytime hook, line and sinker. In my anger yesterday, I told him that if he finds pathetic pleasure in making fun of people, in irritating them, then he can just stay in that childish state of mind. Surely seeking pleasure at the expense of me is mean, if not malicious.

The difference between my idea of being playful is that I don’t intend malice on me but find joy in making people flustered. I enjoy trying to irritate people as I know only too well how annoying it is.

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I was at the KLCC Convention Centre with some colleagues some time back waiting for our transportation back to the office. We were chatting when a car pulled up and out stepped a girl with a Caucasian. The chap next to me wondered out aloud why she couldn’t settle for a nice, local lad instead of a foreigner. What was so great about Caucasians, he wondered. I decided not to say anything as I didn’t want to spoil our camaraderie spirit.

A few days ago, I was browsing through an old friend’s online album: she is married to an American and is now based there. Her children are beautiful and adorable as most children of mixed marriages are but what caught my attention were the pictures of her husband. Now, my friend is a sweet and pretty lady, has always been so, and she looks great now. Her husband, on the other hand, is bald and looks so much older than her. My other colleagues gathered to take a look and questioned her choice of husband: why settle for a foreigner when there are a lot of eligible local lads available? And strangely enough, I felt the need to defend my friend and said simply maybe she was fated to marry a foreigner. I wanted to say so much more of course.

I don’t understand why people even need to comment on something like that. Just because a girl goes out with a Caucasian or someone who is not from the same ethnic group, it doesn’t necessarily mean she rejects her roots or culture (although there are instances of that in some cases, with the local lass appearing and behaving more Caucasian-like than her partner!). Or thinks she is too good for local lads. Because there is no guarantee that a marriage with a local guy would necessarily work and instead of thinking she is too good for the local boys, she may actually be thinking that she is not good enough.

So next time, when you see someone looking a bit different, acting a bit different, having something different, please don’t judge that person immediately. And this is as much a reminder to myself as it is to all.