Without You

It’s just another year.

Another long year to get through.

Another of your birthday.

Another Mother’s Day.

Another of Abah’s birthday.

Another Ramadan.

Another of my birthday.

Another of Akak’s birthday.

Another Syawal.

Another year spent.

All without you.

They say time heals pain. I don’t know if I’m healed, I think I still am healing. I don’t know how long this will take me because to be honest, I don’t know if I will be completely healed. It still hurts after all this time and to some, enough time has gone by surely. But it still feels like yesterday when I could hear and see you. I miss your advice and calming words and I know I disagree with some of your points at times but I don’t discard them outright.

I know I’m not the easiest daughter to have or the easiest to live with what with my stubbornness, my tantrums and my bad temper. But I always try to the best of my ability to be a good daughter to you and Abah. I do try to be a good girl, a good Muslim, a good daughter, niece and aunt. I walk on the right side, walk on the straight and narrow, do not litter, do not spit, do not hurt others, in short, do not do onto others what I don’t want to be done on myself. I don’t smoke, do drugs or drink, never have and insyaAllah never will. But all that is not enough because every living being will be called to meet their Maker.

My Syawal has been bleak, boring and gloomy without you. I don’t feel like celebrating like everyone else. There’s no cause for celebration for me without you with us.

A thousand tears will not bring you back. But I do so wish we could be together again. Because I miss you so much, more than words can ever say.

I MISS YOU, MUMMY. SO MUCH IT HURTS. Al-Fatihah.

Ramadan Ramblings

I don’t think I’m incorrect in saying that we girls are an insecure lot. We keep seeking reassurance of how we look and even we are assured that we look pretty, fine and dandy, we are still not satisfied with the answer (because hey being pretty is not as good as being gorgeous or beautiful). We wonder if the person we ask is being truthful or just tactful, we scrutinise ourselves critically in the mirror trying to find fault with our poor selves, and even if everyone says we look good, we don’t want to believe it. We refuse to accept we are good enough, we compare ourselves relentlessly to celebrities, and we keep thinking ‘If only my eyes are bigger, my nose sharper, my mouth fuller, my cheekbones more pronounced, etc etc etc’. In short, there is just no satisfying us. And you know, you can’t quite blame us for being insecure when we are constantly bombarded by advertisements, articles, documentaries of how an ideal girl looks like, never mind that we are made up of different genetics, body statures, observe different diets, do different jobs, come from different backgrounds and live in different environments.

To make it worse, we also have those mean spiteful malicious women who look down on and put other women down. They are not happy to see others happy and content with themselves; no, instead they are intent on destroying other girls because they are insecure, unhappy and discontent themselves. Why? Why can’t the fairer sex be true to its name and be true and fair to fellow females? Why are we our own worst enemies? Why don’t we help each other, encourage each other and pick someone who’s fallen down instead of pushing her down further? It’s bad enough that we can never have it right: a thin girl is slated for being thin and encouraging others to observe poor eating habits and less-than-normal lifestyle, while an overweight girl is criticised for neglecting herself, for not taking good care of herself and for not living a healthy lifestyle.

It’s not wrong to be insecure; after all, girls are known for their insecurities. It is wrong though to be so insecure with oneself that one resorts to putting others down just so that one would look better. It’s not wrong to envy someone for looking good as long as it prompts us to better ourselves too. But it is wrong to be harsh and critical of another. I believe a beautiful person is one who is beautiful on the inside as well as the outside and someone who is spiteful, malicious and mean is not beautiful to me no matter how gorgeous on the outside s/he is.

So girls, let’s strive to be our best, bring out the beautiful girls that’s within ourselves. Be confident of yourself and don’t let anyone stop you from realising your dreams. Don’t let anyone’s criticism or harsh words bring you down. Exercise, get enough sleep, observe a healthy lifestyle, follow a healthy diet, and be kind to everyone else.

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Peter Cech to Arsenal? I don’t know what to make of this. I don’t trust the Chav club owner or the despicable manager at all to believe they would sell him to us. And if we get him, what will happen to Ospina or Szcz? But what do I know. I don’t know if I want him, if he’s going to be such an upgrade to our current goalies. Sure, he was a decent one but he hasn’t been a regular starter for the Chavs of late.

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I think it’s time to update my Bagaholic post. I’ll get around to it. In the meantime, I seriously want these bags. Sponsors and donations are welcome. Yes, I know that there are a lot of people more in need of the bare necessities like those affected by the quake in Nepal and Ranau, Sabah. And yes, I’ve done my little bit to help them. It’s not wrong to covet a couple of bags, yes?

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It’s a week into Ramadan today and I trust it’s not too late to wish you Ramadan Kareem.

Story Of The Eye

I was on medical leave the whole of last week due to corneal ulcer. Say what, corneal ulcer?! Yes, that was the first time I heard of it myself too.

My left eye started smarting and tearing on Tuesday, a fortnight ago. It got so bad that I decided to set my vanity aside and wear glasses to work on Wednesday. The white eye looked red and thinking it was conjunctivitis, I went to the panel clinic. The GP took a brief look and said it was conjunctivitis too. She said it was at the early stage and gave me some eye drops. She did ask if I needed medical leave and I told her that as I was already at work, I might as well work.

The eye seemed to improve on Thursday evening and it didn’t look red any longer. I did notice a white dot in my black eye though. Thinking it was nothing, I decided to wear contact lens to work the following day.

Well, it was fine until shortly after lunch when my left eye started tearing and smarting again. This time, it was worse than on Tuesday. I somehow made it through work and the journey home half-blind. It worsened that evening so much so it hurt to even read, what more watch TV. Even the light overhead hurt. I had already decided to go to an ophthalmologist the following morning and had checked those at Ampang Puteri and Gleneagles. I decided on the latter and went to bed just after 10 p.m.

I woke up just after midnight and my left eye was really hurting. It was leaking fluid of some sort and when I tried to open my eyes, I could barely see out of my left eye. I wiped off the fluid and tried to go back to sleep but sleep was elusive. I laid awake suffering and hurting and prayed that it would get better soon. My eye kept leaking fluid so much so I wondered if I had an abscess in it.

I reached Gleneagles after 9 on Saturday and went to the Accident and Emergency department. A medical officer examined me and noted the white dot in my left eye. She was not comfortable and rang up the ophthalmologist on call. He was at another clinic at MidValley and would only come at 2 p.m. so they offered me a bed to lie down in or to go home and return. I decided to stay instead. a nurse came and helped put in some eye drops before patching up my left eye. I tried to rest but it was next to impossible as there were people passing by and although there was a curtain to accord privacy, it couldn’t filter out the noise of a hospital: the trolley being pulled, the chatter of nurses, even the snore from the patient in the next bed. Somehow time passed and I was gently awakened just before 2 p.m. by a nurse who told me the ophthalmologist had already arrived.

The ophthalmologist examined my eye and subjected it to some tests. I had to open my eye wide, had some eye drop put in, stare at the light while he took some sample. I’m not a brave person, never have been and never will be, I fear pain and don’t welcome it and the very thought of someone scraping my eye for a sample didn’t sit well with me at all. It was soon over though, thank God. The good-looking doctor told me that it was a corneal ulcer and that the cause was contact lens. Say what? Corneal ulcer? I never knew there was such a thing and what did he mean it was from my contact lens? He also told me that to bring the eye drops given by the GP and tell her that not only had she given me the wrong medication, it would even worsen my eye condition. He lamented the fact that some GPs would just do a quick check and conclude it’s conjunctivitis when it could be something much more serious.

He prescribed me some eye drops and I went to wait. After 15 minutes, a nurse came out and told me the medication would take some time to prepare and that I might want to either return later or lie down. ‘Three to four hours,’ she said and I stared at her in disbelief.

Well, I didn’t stay there but instead, feeling sufficiently better, made my way to KLCC. I returned later, at 7 p.m. and there were four eye drops waiting for me with various instructions.

So that was how that Saturday was spent and how last week was spent (I was dying of boredom even before Monday was over!). Alhamdulillah I’m recovering well although I have to wear those stupid glasses now. I’m seriously considering LASIK now.

FA Cup Final 2015: Arsenal vs Aston Villa

I’ll let the pictures do the talking.

 

 

No More Trip To Singers

The Ringgit has depreciated such against other major currencies in the past year that for the first time in years, I won’t be going to Singers for the sale this year. I decided to instead give Johor Premium Outlets another chance and, availing the Firefly anniversary offer, I bought flight to Senai for last Saturday.

We were supposed to land at 09:40 but due to the busy air space (at least that was what I understood from the captain’s announcement), we only touched down at 09:55. We had planned to make a short trip to JB before going to JPO and the next bus from the airport was at 10. We rushed out and hurried through the terminal but when we walked out only a couple of minutes past 10, there was no bus. We turned back to ask at the bus counter. I certainly didn’t want to wait another 58 minutes for the next bus to the city so I asked what other options we had. The friendly and helpful lady told us we could take a bus to Kulai or Larkin and then change for a bus to the city. So we thanked her and went out again to wait.

We didn’t have to wait long. A bus drew up about five minutes later and we asked if we could take it to Kulai (I saw the destinations on a board in front of the bus) and from there, changed for another to JB. He confirmed that indeed we could, so we paid him the RM1.30 fare and settled in. It was a short ride. He stopped the bus like five minutes later and told us to take a bus from the bus stop across the road so we got down and crossed over. And luck was again with us for a bus bound for the city came within less than five minutes. And a local woman told me that it was easier for us to take the bus to JB from there than from Larkin as there’s only one bus from Larkin to JB whereas there are a few services from Kulai to JB. We paid RM3 this time. The direct Causeway Link bus from the airport to the city would have cost us RM8 and like I said earlier, would have caused us to spend a long waiting time at the airport.

We reached Jalan Wong Ah Fook at 11:11 and everyone went down as it was the last stop. It was threatening to rain and as we had seen half of JB from the bus – in the air-conditioned comfort no less – we decided to head for City Square. We wandered around then went to check out the food court. As it was still early, we decided to cross over to JB Sentral to see if it had any eatery.

It was pouring by the time we crossed over to JB Sentral but we were dry as there is a covered overhead bridge linking City Square with JB Sentral. We weren’t impressed with the dining options and I looked across again and spotted Komtar. So we crossed back and headed for Komtar. It looked recently renovated: everything looked shiny, clean, modern and new. And the crowd was not large either. We went to the food court and although there were not as many options as there were at City Square, we decided to have our lunch there. I’m glad we did as the kuay teow bandung I ordered was prepared from stretch and was richly spiced (but not spicy!) and tasteful.

We went to use the washrooms and as the prayer rooms were nearby and it was already time for Zuhor prayers, we decided to perform prayers there (we had planned to do so at JPO). And again, I’m so glad we performed prayers there as the prayer room was clean, spacious and comfortable. The one at JPO was very much smaller and had no feet mat. Ugh.

We hurried back to JB Sentral as we were going to take the 13:30 JPO1 bus to JPO. The bus arrived at 13:27 and we queued up (some had to be told to queue, but of course. Lovely Malaysians with manners huh). The fare was RM4.50 and I settled down for a kip as I was already up before 04:00 a.m. It rained along the way.

We arrived at JPO just before 3 p.m. and took our time walking in and out of stores. I think I must have gone into 90% of the stores there. There were stores that I went to twice. In the end, I bought a leather belt from Hugo Boss as it was in my size (surprise, surprise. It’s always been hard for me to buy a European brand belt in Malaysia as they always seem to sell the bigger sizes). That was it. I must have walked miles at JPO and had only that belt to show for it. Ah well, I’m a wise shopper heh.

We went to the bus stand for the 18:35 bus to the airport. The bus arrived early and the driver told us of the complimentary ride to and fro Senai Airport but that we needed to get the vouchers for the centre’s information office. We rushed back to the information office, asked for the complimentary bus vouchers then rushed back to the bus. Phew! I think you can get the complimentary bus voucher at the bus counter at the airport.

We went to get the airline sticker for our brolly and then walked out to A&W beyond the roundabout just outside the airport for dinner. The flight left on time, we landed on time but had to endure a long wait for the bus back to KL.

Anyway shoppers, no reason to head down to JPO anymore: Mitsui Outlet Park KLIA Sepang opens from 30 May 2015!!! There are stores common to both outlets and there are stores that exist in one but not the other. For me, two visits to JPO are enough.

Fun Taiwan 2015: Part II

Friday, 1 May 2015

I left the hotel at 07:15 and walked to the station where I found that my 07:38 train to Taitung was delayed by three minutes. It was an express train and stopped at many stations (a limited express would take less time as it stops at fewer stations and costs more of course). Never mind. I had my novel to occupy me and the scenery that flew past: towns, villages, paddy fields, distant mountains, dry rivers. We finally reached an overcast Taitung at 12:45 and I went to buy train ticket to Taipei for the following morning. This time, I bought a limited express train ticket – the slightly cheaper ticket would take me three additional hours before I reached Taipei and after today’s train ride of more than five hours, I think I’d experienced enough. Oh don’t get me wrong. Taiwanese train system is fast, efficient and reliable but I just didn’t fancy spending more than seven hours cooped in one only 24 hours after being in one for five hours.

After purchasing my train ticket, I went to the Visitor Centre to ask for directions to my B&B. It was really threatening to rain and I kept casting a worried look at the sky as I walked. It took me 15 minutes to get to my B&B and I must say the area around my B&B was a bit strange. First I walked along a main road before turning into a lane (which turned out to be passable for vehicles), walked a bit more before crossing another main road to a neighbourhood which looked pretty new. The B&B I stayed at was around the next left bend, a corner unit. It was actually a four-storey house and I later found that a few rooms were let out to guests. The lady running it invited me in and took my details. She didn’t speak English at all so we communicated using a translator on her smartphone. I was then shown to a room on the ground floor (phew!), the only room on the ground floor.

The B&B lady’s friend who was there to visit spoke a bit of English and offered to take me to the city. I thanked her and accepted the offer for I didn’t think I’d be joining any shuttle tour be it the Rift Valley or East Coast tour due to the discouraging weather. Indeed it rained just after 1 p.m.

We left for the city centre five km away in the rain (I borrowed the B&B owner’s brolly). She dropped me off at Visitor Centre near the old train station (no longer in use. The one I arrived at is a new station for the city) and I went into the Visitor Centre. The girl behind the counter gave me a dining map and also the schedule for the bus back to the train station. Armed with the map given by her and the one I picked when I arrived, I set off in the rain. What little I saw of Taitung in the rain didn’t impress me much though but I walked on. Then I went to find late lunch but the vegetarian restaurant at the corner of Baosang Road and Fujian Road would only open for business at 16:30 so I walked off again and wandered around the fruit market before returning at 5 for early dinner. I had bamboo shoot soup and noodles for dinner. Then I walked back to the Visitor Centre to get the bus back to the station. The bus was late by ten minutes and the driver didn’t give any change (the fare was NTD25, I had NTD30. It was a good thing I didn’t give him a bigger note).

From the station, I walked back to the B&B. The rain had stopped by then. I came back to an empty and dark house. I took a shower and rested in my room. Slowly, the other guests came back from their day out.

Saturday, 2 May 2015

I woke up at 6 and had a shower. I was eating bread in my room when there was a knock – turned out the B&B owner’s husband wanted to drive me to the station and wanted me to hurry. I quickly finished packing and went out. We had gone into the car when I showed him my train ticket and he immediately relaxed when he realised my train was only leaving in 40 minutes. We left for the station at 07:40 and it was only when I was in the train waiting for it to depart that I realised I’d left my newly purchased bucket hat behind in my haste ;’( or rather when I was rushed off to the station. Dammit!

We pulled into Taipei just before noon and after getting my bearings, I went off to find my hostel. After checking in, I rested for a bit before setting off again. I walked and found the Zhongshan Metro Mall (I somehow couldn’t find the mall entrance back in September) and walked to Zhongshan station. At Zhongshan station, I went out to explore the area before getting back into the mall and walking to Shuanglian station before taking the metro to Shilin station. I had dinner at the seafood stall where we had our meal in September before exploring the market. I left empty-handed though. I took the train from Jiantan back to Taipei Main Station and walked back to the hostel.

Sunday, 3 May 2015

I left after breakfast today and decided to walk to Taipei Grand Mosque. Yes, I walked 3 km there. I then went across to Daan Park to wait for Zuhor. Well, that was the plan anyway and Zuhor was an hour away. Before long though, clouds had gathered overhead threatening rain so I decided to leave and walk the 4.2 km to Taipei 101. There were a lot of people at Taipei 101 – turned out there was a tower run today. I went into the mall and walked around before browsing the boutiques.

I returned back to the hostel, taking the metro this time. Before exiting the station, I bought some sushi for lunch, dinner and breakfast the following morning and some oolong tea from Sushi Takeout. I the stayed in for the rest of the day as I had an early start the next morning. Oh, I walked at least 12.6 km today. Yeay me!

Monday, 4 May 2015

I woke at 4 to the sound of rain. Oh no! I got ready, performed prayers and left at 04:45 and walked to the Taipei West Bus Station for the bus to the airport. It had already stopped raining by then phew. There were a few people about already: the newspaper vendors and some early riser business owners. I bought the 1819 bus ticket to the airport (there was another bus to the airport but it would take 70 minutes as it stops at a few hotels en route). There was a long queue to board the bus and I was lucky that I was the last four allowed up, alhamdulillah. We arrived at the airport at 05:45 (it was already bright) and I immediately went off to drop my bag. The check-in queue was really long – I can never understand why people don’t just check in online prior to flying as it saves so much time.

There was another long queue to clear security (fast one though) and then it was immigration check. My plane took off on time and I dozed off during take-off. There was some problem with the inflight entertainment but I had stopped watching inflight movies anyway – just not interested in the selection most times.

We landed at 12:20 (ETA was 12:40, well done MAS!) and I was on the 13:00 train to KL Sentral.

Will there a fourth trip to Taiwan? Not in the very near future for sure.

Fun Taiwan 2015: Part I

This trip was planned at the back of my mind shortly after the Taiwan trip last September although I didn’t expect it to materialise so soon. This is the first time in ten years that I had not planned to go to Europe in end-spring as I’m wont to do due to a few factors. See, my passport was expiring and I wanted to wait a bit before renewing it. Then there’s the football season which ends later this time around. I had also planned to save my leave for a tour but had to wait until the MATTA Fair to find out the departure date (the tour didn’t materialise for me though as it would take place in early September and that’s not a good time for me to be away from the office as August is a busy month). When I found out that the passport renewal would be reduced to RM200, I decided to travel to Taiwan instead, bought my flight ticket and renewed my passport. I then sorted out accommodation and planned the trip (must admit the planning wasn’t as thorough as past trips).

Wednesday, 29 April 2015

We landed at Taoyuan International Airport at 06:20. Bags took a while to emerge. My initial plan was to buy the 1819 bus ticket to Taipei Main Station and from there buy train ticket to Chiayi. As things turned out, I took another route down to the airport bus station and as I was walking towards the counter, I noticed there are bus services to a few cities including Chiayi from the airport via Zhongli Station. The ticket was only NTD240 which is a lot less than the airport bus and train ticket combined and the next bus out was at 07:30. Alhamdulillah. I had my breakfast (which was the late-night supper from MAS) while waiting for my bus to Zhongli Station.

We arrived Zhongli Station at 07:49 and I waited for the 08:10 bus to Chiayi. Bus was late though; it only arrived at 08:30. There was a bad standstill on the freeway as we were heading out of Taipei but it eased gradually.

We arrived at Chiayi Bus Station just before 13:00. I made queries at the Visitor Centre before buying return busticket to Alishan for the following morning (NTD236 for one way) and then finding my hotel. I was pleased to see that my hotel was all of five minutes from the train station. I rested for a bit before venturing out again after 16:00. I wasn’t so pleased though when I found that There were so many tea stalls there that I wondered how any of them stay in business long enough! And of the dozens of restaurants and stalls around, I couldn’t find any selling seafood or vegetarian food. None. Zilch. Nada. In the end, I bought some snacks for dinner.

Thursday, 30 April 2015

Woke up at 05:15 and had a quick shower. A light breakfast followed. I left the hotel at 05:50 and went to the train station to fill up my water bottle before boarding the 06:10 bus to Alishan (the first bus out). The lady across the aisle from had a backpack bearing a familiar logo so I asked if she was Malaysian too. The trip took slightly over two hours and we had to get down at the entrance to the AlishanNational Scenic Area and pay the entrance fee of NTD150. The lady from Malaysia helped translate for me. After paying for the ticket, we re-boarded the bus before getting down at the bus stand at Alishan (the last stop). I went to the Visitor Centre first – where I learnt that it’d take 2.5 hours to walk around the area - before heading for the train station. I had intended to take the Alishan Forest Train to Sacred Tree station and then back before taking the train again to Zhaoping station.

There was a notice at the train station stating that the ticket office would open at 09:30 (first train out is at 10:00 anyway, to Zhaoping) so I settled down to wait. I was getting restless (it was barely 09:00 and I had another hour before the train was due to depart) and then I noticed a sign that said the train ride to Zhaoping would take six minutes but one could also walk there and reach there in 30 minutes. I looked around at the growing number of people outside the station heading somewhere and thought, what the heck, I might as well walk and if I did, I’d reach Zhaoping even before the ticket office at Alishan train station opened! So I walked back to the Visitor Centre to ask for directions (the chap didn’t speak much English though) and set off. And guess what? A lot of the locals were already walking so it looked like they all chose to walk rather than wait for the train.

I walked on to Zhaoping and turned into Zhaoping Park. Sadly, the cherry blossoms were no longer in bloom ;’( oh well. I walked on and saw signs to Sisters Pond and decided to head there. At Sisters Pond, there was a trail to Tashan. I hesitated and dithered before finally deciding to give it a miss (a good thing too as I just realised now it’s a 6.8-km trail!). I walked on and asked for directions to the Scented Wood Arch Bridge. I was told it’s after Shouzhen Temple so I followed signs to the temple. I must have walked miles already by then but I must say that the Alishan area is so easy to navigate and I can say that for I walked its length in my FitFlop (I decided to leave my Converse out of my suitcase at the last minute).

I followed the trail to the Three Generation Tree, Alishan Museum (everything was in Mandarin though), Xianglin Sacred Tree and the Giant Trees Boardwalk. I then followed the trail descending down all the way to Sacred Tree Station. I couldn’t thank God enough that I decided to walk to Zhaoping first and back from Sacred Tree instead of the other way round; if I had walked or taken the train to Sacred Tree Station first and return back to Alishan station from Zhaoping, I’d have to climb up from Sacred Tree Station to the Giant Trees Boardwalk and Xianglin Sacred Tree. That would be a very painful strenuous exhausting climb indeed. I could still walk back to Alishan but no way was I going to climb back up to the trail so train it was. And luckily for me, there was a train at noon (this time is not stated in the online train schedule though). So I paid NTD50 for the single ticket back to Alishan (a round trip ticket costs NTD80) and waited for the train.

The ride took only six minutes and I was out of the station with three hours left to my bus ride back to Chiayi (I indicated 15:10 as my departure time from Alishan when I bought the bus ticket). I remembered that I managed to change the train ticket from Taipei to Kaohsiung last September and decided to try out my luck. Luckily again for me, there was a couple from Shenzhen in front of me who were also on the waiting list and they understood enough English to help translate for me. The bus driver for the 12:40 trip finally let us on after ascertaining those who had purchased the ticket for that slot had all boarded. We arrived back at Chiayi at 14:45 and I walked back to my hotel to rest after buying a train ticket to Taitung for the following morning.

I went out after 5 p.m. to search for dinner and found myself walking again to Wenhua Road Night Market. I was in luck this time: stumbled upon a stall selling sushi and noodles so I asked if the seller could prepare me a bowl of seafood noodles. I walked back to the hotel after dinner.

To be continued