* This post is very much inspired by Nick Hornby’s brilliantly hilarious Fever Pitch. I love the novel and can so relate to him
I don’t quite remember how it happened nor can I recall the circumstances leading to it. All I know is that I’ve fallen in love – inexplicably, unexpectedly, amazingly. I try to find the reasons but I can’t now. And I’m not sure why I fell too. All I know is that there is a relationship and on my part, I feel it a strong one. They say you always know when you fall in love but for me, the details don’t matter much but the fact that I’m in love. At the start, I had no idea or clue of the pain or disruption this love and relationship would bring.
I suppose you can say I fell in love with football first before Arsenal. My friends always express their surprise when they learn that I like footie so much. ‘I never knew you’re into football,’ they would say. Well, of course they didn’t know. At boarding school, we hardly ever watched football, heck, we hardly ever watched TV at all – though I can still remember pleading that we be allowed to watch some local match (not even the English Premier League!) between KL and Selangor after a major exam. They didn’t know I watched Euro and World Cup matches during holidays even back then. For me, it’s not a sport exclusively for males. All those football hunks! I suppose Abah’s appreciation for the game has rubbed off on me though I must admit at times I’m more of a footie fanatic than he is.
While I may have fallen in love with football a long time before falling for Arsenal, it is Arsenal that have held me captivated now. I started buying Arsenal t-shirts and even asking my friend to buy some original merchandise online for me – and my nieces and nephew. Yes, I have decided that I shall exercise my power and dictatorship and insist/force them to also support Arsenal (they seem pretty neutral at the moment although they do love the Arsenal merchandise I bought them). No way are they going to support another club and if they suddenly decide to, I will demand that they return the merchandise back to me. Hmmpph!
Sometimes I wonder what it’d be like to have a partner who (God forbid) supports another team (I even shared this fear with SK), or having children who grow up supporting another club. As it is, I often wonder how I’d turn down weekend dates just so that I can watch footie – do I just decline without stating the reason; do I bluff some kind of excuse; or do I just tell the truth? For it’s a no-brainer which I’d choose between watching at least 11 blokes playing over a date with just one lad (I’d very well choose the former). And what about other social invitations (weddings, birthday parties, ceremonies, etc)? I went to my high school reunion but insisted on watching footie that evening. As it is, I already have to ask my poor friends to text me the results whenever I’m away (I try to plan my holidays around footie schedules but this is not that possible). I even called up Astro to add the sports channel to my parents’ package just so I can watch footie when I’m at home base. Because like it or not, my life has started to revolve around football. I won’t watch movies on Saturday afternoons so that I can rest for the match later that evening, nor would I go out on Sunday mornings when Football Extra is being aired. Football is an inevitability that has to be worked around with. So I pray that no one in my family or close friends will get ill suddenly and that there will be no sudden emergencies when there’s a footie match on because honestly I’m not sure if I’d do the right thing. Thing is, I’m not mature enough to do the right thing most of the time and what more if it involves football/Arsenal.
(I have warned my friend that our next high school reunion – which they say should be done in five years’ time – should not be held in June or July because that’s when the World Cup will be (where will it be held anyway?). Nor should it be held anytime between January–May because that’s still within the Premier League season. Ideally, it should be held in August – after the lull of the World Cup and before the new Premier League season starts. I argued that this is not entirely in self-interest for having a reunion then will enable those friends currently residing abroad to return home during their summer hols. Either that or I won’t attend the reunion, I threatened. Yes, I’m still very childish that way).
If I could have my way, I’d like to have stayed on in England (OK, London) and work there. If I could afford it, I’d buy a unit at Highbury Square (and be part of history) and walk to all home games, yes, including those played by those on the reserve team (not too sure about travelling to away games though, especially in mid-week). Oh, if only I could have my way and if only wishes come true!
Unfortunately, footie is not all that predictable. I’m still gripped with stomach-turning fear before big games and the lingering depression that follows defeats. It is perhaps silly to let myself be so influenced and involved with football but heck Arsenal have become a part of my life now and occupy some chunk of my thoughts and time. Sometimes I wonder if the players have this in mind too, this consideration and responsibility I’m sure they owe to us fans. I’d like to think they do and that they don’t solely play for the money. It’s a two-way relationship and as in any two-way relationship, both parties must play their role. The fans must give support while the players must play well enough to ensure they are worthy of that support. (I have no sympathy and disagree with fans who slag off and slang the manager or players just because a few matches didn’t turn out as expected. And I have no sympathy either for players for who don’t look interested enough to play or who act as if they’re not proud enough to play for the club/country). So yes, this love relationship is similar to the normal relationship with loved ones in that you suffer heartaches, pain, depression, anger and trauma, just as you experience joy, happiness, ecstasy and that floating feeling that accompany a win.
So where is all this going? What is the point of this blog entry? I hope that you will now appreciate how much football means to me. That this is not some silly infatuation on my part but a real relationship that I nurture. That I worry and fret over Arsenal and that is no laughing matter, do not snigger at me when I’m down and depressed and do not dismiss it as a childish pre-occupation. This is not a crush I can overcome. And no one is allowed to slag off Arsenal but I can do that as a fan (I don’t slag off your team so stay off mine).
If I can ask from you, it’s understanding and tolerance of my football-induced moods, and acceptance of my relationship with football/Arsenal (in some context, synonymous with each other).
Thank you for your kind attention and understanding.
Opps, one of them may be a Gunner no more. For putting up shitty performances, we say Bye-Bye Bayor and off you go to Man Sh*tty~~~~~~~~
July 2009 is a special month indeed. There are two eclipses this month. The first is lunar eclipse which took place on 7 July and the next one will be a solar eclipse which will take place on 22 July. I also received an email predicting an earthquake and tsunami on 22 July 2009... Will there be another earthquake in New Zealand after yesterday’s quake? Guess we’ll just have to wait and see.
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I went for a course Monday and Tuesday and the instructor told me on Tuesday that I looked 17. So I replied, ‘I am 17, 17 Again!’
Then a newbie also asked how old I was because I looked ‘really really young.’
I’m chuffed, I really am.
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