Extraordinary People

I’ve just finished reading My Story by David Pelzer, which is a compilation of his three novels A Child Called ‘It’, The Lost Boy and A Man Called Dave. I cried through the first few chapters of A Child Called ‘It’. I couldn’t help it (I’m emo when reading touching stories and even watching sad movies) and I wondered how some mothers can be so cruel and abusive to their own flesh and blood. It’s beyond comprehension. But then again, Dave was born in the 1960s (he was rescued at the age of 12 in 1973) and at that time, people didn’t talk of things like this. In fact, they probably regarded what he received as a form of disciplining children and so what if the parent was a little harsh. And people believed in minding their own business then so even though the neighbours were probably aware of what was happening, they didn’t think of notifying the police.

The Lost Boy describes Dave’s account as an adolescent in the foster care system, how he adapted to life in the real world and the difficulties he faced with this and with dealing with the questions in his mind of why his mother abused him so. All this was made even more difficult as he had to move from one foster home to another because of circumstances. He craved for love and attention (as any child would). In those days, people looked down on foster children and foster parents; if you ended up in foster care, it must be because your parents couldn’t handle you (or in other words, you were either a difficult, problematic child who couldn’t be disciplined) or an unwanted child. As for foster parents, the perception was they were only doing it for the money.

In A Man Called Dave, Dave talked about his struggles to earn a living, his first marriage which eventually ended, joining the Air Force, his father’s death from terminal cancer, how he finally made peace with his mother, his voluntary work with youth at risk, and his second marriage. It’s amazing what he went through really as you’d expect someone in that situation having to overcome so much and adjust oneself to the real world would have a lot of difficulties, a low self-esteem and insecurities.

I couldn’t help but wonder what made abusers the way they are. Were they abused at some point in their early life too? Why doesn’t society try better to help the abused children or the youth at risk? Isn’t it better to help them when they’re young before they turn into frustrated, confused, angry abusers themselves later in life?

And while reading this book, I was reminded of another extraordinary person who also managed to overcome obstacles in her life: Liz Murray, a homeless girl who eventually was accepted into Harvard (there’s a movie on her, From Homeless to Harvard). Isn’t it strange how cruel humans can be, to inflict pain and suffering on others, and yet how amazingly strong human spirit can be in facing life’s challenges?