Only In My Dreams

I looked over at him. He was sleeping and looked so much at peace. I love this handsome young man so, I do. I was content to just watch him sleep. Occasionally, I ran my fingers through his hair. He didn't even stir.

But he isn't mine, never mine to begin with. And will never be mine. No matter how much and hard I wish that he is. He's what I think my boy will look/be like. But for now, Only In My Dreams.

He's my nephew. [And be rest assured, I'm no paedophile, nor am I into incestous relationship!]

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I had this extremely excruciating especially painful leg cramp early this morning - at 3.40 am - that woke me up and had me groaning and moaning in pain. It's never been that Bad before. Of late I've been getting them cramps quite frequently but this morning's was the most killing of all. And the first thing that crossed my mind was that maybe it was God's punishment to me for drawing up my SUBARU list of why I should live on my own. The pain lasted for about 10 excruciating minutes and I couldn't really sleep after that. So tell me, what brings about leg cramps and how do I avoid them and what I should do if I still get them. I Sometimes get toe cramps too, especially when I'm walking about. The last time it happened was a fortnight ago when I was Shopping in Isetan.

So maybe I do need a sleeping partner after all, and a permanent one at that. Not a temporary bedfellow who leaves in the morning. But one who can take care of me, among other things (but of course!). Except that at the moment, this imaginary permanent bed partner is still Only In My Dreams. He doesn't yet appear in a physical form.

I had a dream when sleep Finally reclaimed me after the leg cramp. In the dream, I was back in my hometown of London. And guess who shared the dream? Why, it was DoctorJones! It could be 'cause I've been thinking of him often of late. But hey gotta remember that the meeting in London was Only In My Dreams.

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My mate who gives me my daily ride home also echoed my girlfriend C's earlier remark that I do not go for people who like me but go for those who may likely hurt me/break my heart. I don't know, maybe I attract people I'm not attracted to? And people I'm attracted to don't get attracted to me. Have mine always be cases of Fatal Attraction on the part of one party only? Beats me. [Look if I have the slightest clue, I wouldn't be having all these problems, would I!].

Will I ever find my life partner? Or will he ever appear Only In My Dreams?

No, no, no, no, only in my dreams
As real as it may seem
It was only in my dreams