That Time Of Year

Well, yet another year is coming close to an end. It’s time again to reflect on the year, to take stock, to assess and contemplate. Time to make the coming year, all eager to come meet us, a more meaningful, successful and better than the past 12 months had been. Have I been a good person? I don’t think I have made much improvement; if anything, I lose my temper more quickly and when I do, at times it is more violent than before. So yes, this is a continued effort from me to rein in my temper and emotions. Wish me luck.

Giroud, me and the funny and furry LOL Cats would like to wish everyone a beautiful holiday season and a new year of peace, love and happiness. Enjoy your holidays, don’t over-indulge and have a red-and-white Christmas!

Somebody To Love

Two people I know got married within four weeks of each other. One to a single again man and another was a single again man himself. I don’t think it’s an easy thing, to be married to a man (or woman) with children from a previous marriage. One has to woo the adult while winning the hearts of the children. They may be fine with you dating their parent, but are they as receptive to the idea of you replacing their other parent?

I don’t think it was easy for Mummy to marry Abah (and indeed she didn’t want to at first) and inherit five instant children, all who were likely brainwashed by their maternal grandparents of how evil Mummy would be. Stepmothers always have a bad reputation, don’t they. I mean, we grow up with those stories of evil, wicked stepmothers – Cinderella and Snow White, our fairy tale heroines, both have stepmothers.

But perhaps it’s easier now in this modern day to get used to this idea what with the numerous failed marriages around us. You get used to the idea and it’s no longer a foreign concept. Indeed, a few of my maternal cousins are married to men who had married before. In this age where love becomes more difficult to find, maintain and nurtured, we see more people in their second, even third, marriage. We can’t deny or begrudge the second chance some have at love. We just hope that this would be the right one and wish them happiness.

When I look back upon my past relationships, I’m hard-pressed to recall if I was ever in love. I don’t think I can say with all honesty that I was in love with any of the guys. Some were fun while they lasted, some not so. And although the demise of each relationship left me somewhat shattered, I don’t think I was ever in love in any of them. And it makes me wonder if I will ever love, if I will ever find my love, if there is one. If maybe I’m just unfeeling, have lost my feelings or maybe, if I even have feelings. Sure, the end of them was always painful and hurtful, but love?

Oh, I know I’m fussy and hard to please and some people have told me to lower my standards/expectations. I’m not yet prepared to do this but I suppose I would reconsider if and when I meet the right person - which I haven’t had just yet.

And I suppose this is what people do when they meet their right person, when they meet somebody to love: they accept and adjust their expectations. And who knows, I might actually meet someone I have feelings for and do the same one day.

That’s More Like It

After another difficult ‘super-crisis’ week where we crashed out of the Capital One Cup at Bradford, Lady Nina’s tweets and Titi’s meeting with the dinosaur Usmanov, Arsenal travelled again, this time to Reading. I have always maintained the players are as much to blame for not delivering and last night, they stepped up and delivered. I tweeted some of the players and told them (yes, I know they may not read my tweets but I don’t care) that I don’t care if it’s a 1-0 scrape, I don’t care who scores, I don’t care if it’s not a clean sheet as long as Arsenal WIN. I told them that Wenger has faith in them and that they should repay it. I told them that the fans have faith in them but that they must win and fight for us, that they must prove that they’re worthy and proud of playing for Arsenal. Oh sure it was against Reading who currently occupy the basement spot in the league but we have seen all too often how Arsenal can even screw matches against lower placed teams.

Poldi opened the scoring followed by a hat-trick from Cazorla and Theo rounded it off. Cue sighs of relief.

This Love

This post is about Arsenal so you have been warned.

I was so angry, pissed, disappointed after the home defeat to Swansea that I questioned if I should take a break from Arsenal. If this relationship should now cool down, if I should stop now before I get my heart broken further. I woke up yesterday morning still feeling pissing mad, hopping angry and seething. Went to visit Mummy then went for a facial and massage where I thought things through.

And I came to this conclusion: yes, it’s only natural for us to be angry, betrayed and let down because we are true supporters and we have invested a lot into the club. We invest time, money, effort, energy, passion, emotions and feelings into it. Sometimes I arrange my travel plans according to matches. It’s become so much a part of my life, maybe not a healthy part of it for Arsenal are known to give us all heart ache and panic attacks, but yes, despite all that, I can’t imagine going through the motions of life without it. And that is precisely why we feel angry and affected - because we care. We care too much. We show and shower our love, care and concern and expect our feelings to be reciprocated.

A lot of people are angry at Wenger because he’s the convenient target. And yes, he has a lot to answer for because he chose the players, bought them and train them. He spends a lot of time, effort and energy developing them so he’ll be the most disappointed when the players don’t perform. He has faith in them but do they repay his faith? He’s one of the most loyal persons to Arsenal I know and even players can’t say that – not unless you’re Carl Jenkinson or Jack Wilshere. He has achieved so much for Arsenal, won us trophies and ensures we are in the Champions League for 16 straight years. But does this mean he can’t make mistakes? We all make mistakes anyway and we learn from them. Sometimes the players he invested in just fall short of expectations or are not good enough for Arsenal.

But I thought about it: how different is Arsenal and its players than you and me? Think about it further: if you were a parent/guardian/educator, wouldn’t you be disappointed too if your child/student lets you down? Of course you would. But do you give up on that child? Of course not! If you can’t relate to being a parent or guardian, well, we are all children to our parents (and our parents will still think such of us as long as we are their children) and on my part, I admit I gave (and still give) my parents worry and heart ache a lot of the time. But I never expected them to give up on me. Even if I didn’t ace my exam, I still want them to love, encourage, motivate and support me. Yes, I’m disappointed that Arsenal continually let me down and break my heart but should I just easily give up on it? Do I walk away from this relationship at the first sign of trouble? Am I a fair-weathered fan who only supports them when times are good?

Let’s look at it from Wenger’s point of view. If I have a subordinate who’s not performing, who’s not pulling his weight, do I just give up and wash my hands off him? I would still try to coach and develop him. But if an employee is a disinterested learner, can’t be bothered, has an attitude or just downright lazy, despite the effort spent to coach him, is it the manager’s fault? If a child who is educated, brought up well and showered with love still chooses to be an obnoxious brat, should we just blame the parents? There’s only so much a manager – or a parent - can do. That’s why some workplaces have employee voluntary separation scheme or mutual separation scheme. I’m not trying to make excuses for Wenger, I’m just merely trying to understand his problems.

I’m not saying Wenger is not irreplaceable or indispensible. It will be harder to find a replacement for him because he’s too involved with Arsenal. A lot of fans are calling for his head but can a new manager guarantee we will be winning matches? A new manager will still have to operate within the circumstances and limitations that Wenger currently is operating in. He would still subject to the same budget limitations and working environment and be answerable to the same shareholders and Board. I don’t care about Chelshit but I know they are having problems of late too. Does changing manager necessarily help? NO. Sure, they won trophies last year but the same guy who helped them win them was still sacked.

A lot of fans have issues with how money is spent. Well, I always believe we should invest in quality. All the money in the Sheikh’s deep pocket can’t help Man Shitty progress beyond the group stage of Champions League. And look at Swansea: why, they play attractive football and dare I say it, somewhat reminiscent of how we (used to) play and should play. I don’t think they have such huge funds to invest in players and yet they can still win. Look at West Bromwich Albion and other clubs. They don’t have rich major shareholders and are unable to buy expensive players and yet they are still doing well. Better in fact than Arsenal. That is not to say we don’t have to invest further, that our investment is done. Buy shit quality and you get shit product. Our players have quality, they are just under-performing. And the sad worrying fact is we don’t have many options and quality available from the bench apart from the regular first XI players. And even if we make purchases in January, we still need to give time for the newcomers to settle in. Heck, Torres is still settling in and he’s been playing at the Premier League for years now. We still have seven matches until end of the year. Seven. The players are tired but they must fight on, just like tennis players in grand slam tournaments where they play every other day.

As difficult as it is, this is the time when Wenger and the players need our support the most. I’m not saying we can’t be critical but we have to stand together and support the team. What’s the point of being a season ticket holder if you can’t attend home matches? What’s the point of being a fan if you can’t support them through bad times as well as good? Why can’t we be more like Rangers fans? Whatever happened to Victoria Concordia Crescit? Has it been replaced to Victoria Disconcordia Crescit instead? Why not support the team and manager? Why must some of us yell abuse and in fact wish death on some players?

Aud and I agree that we have to brace ourselves for more hurt. But we’ll ride it together, Gooners. Keep calm because we’re all Gooners and we should be united behind our team. We should be with them through thick and thin, through sickness and health, through ups and downs, koy and misery, through the years. Remember, it’s always darkest before the dawn. Have faith, believe. Forwards and upwards, Arsenal!